*ehu.

San Diego, I LOVE YOU!

2012-01-28T17:36:00.000-08:00

Last night, I went out with one of my good ol' friends, Rudy. Cool guy, I've known him since my single digit years.... I think since we were 8 or 9 years old, in Primary. Time surely flies. It's cool that we're still friends and live in the same general area. We were texting back and forth about being hungry and not knowing what to eat. He introduced me to this AWESOME TJ style taco stand in town. LOVE IT!! But we eat there all the time. So we ended up at SONIC!!!!

Oh man, I LOVE LOVE LOVE this place!! I haven't been there since Summer 2010 while I was up in Utah. I'm so glad that Rudy suggested this place!! It's about 20 min. east of us, but it always seemed farther, til tonight. LOVE!!! I'm DEFINITELY going back soon!!

Rudy and I had been talking for months about going to eat at my FAVORITE dessert spot here in town, EXTRAORDINARY DESSERTS!!!
Yesterday was National Chocolate Cake day!!! SO YUMMY DELICIOUS!!! Although this wasn't my beloved Viking cake, it was just as good.

Since we were near downtown San Diego, we cruised on over to the Spruce Street bridge. I use to work near it, but never checked it out. Heard about it, but didn't exactly know what type of bridge it was.... til last night. Oh man!! It's a SUSPENSION bridge!!!! As in, it's suspended from one side to the other and is NOTHING. LIKE. THE. ONES. AT. A. PLAYGROUND.!!!! I mean, there are some SERIOUS wires attached. Some larger than my arm!! So you know this is some serious business!!

At first, I was thinking, "Sure, I'll try it, not like it REALLY moves?!" Wrong, SO wrong! Oh man, it was scary/trippy. I had to take it in increments. Got about 1/4 in, then turned back because it was wobbly. Went back to the start and assessed it.
Start again.
Got 1/2 in on the bridge. (but didn't know it was half way while I was standing on this wobbly and shaking bridge that's suspended 70 feet above the ground!) I bolted back to the start and assessed it, again!! (It was easier to go back the start because the car was on that side, of course.) Have I mentioned that Rudy's by my side the whole time trying to encourage me and not make fun of me--at least, not aloud. I REALLY wanted to get to the other side!! Not for the scenery, because it was dark but because I'd get over a fear of doing something scary! It's funny how "bragging rights" can be a HUGE motivator!!
Start again.
Rudy was a huge help! He was doing his very, VERY best to distract me and ask me all sorts of questions as I was doing my very, VERY best to get to the other side, quickly!!!
I had never been so happy to see the other side of a bridge!!! Then I realized that we couldn't get home until we returned back. 5 minutes to breathe and accept that fact.
Start again.
Got 1/8 in and realized that the bridge is completely suspended from the start, so that means IMMEDIATE boucing, shaking, and wobbling going on!!! Since Rudy's right behind me, I can't easily turn around, nor do I REALLY want to be running, on a suspended brige, in front of someone--not the prettiest sight.
Thought pattern:
Breathe.
Step forward.
Breathe.
Grip hand rail for dear life.
Breathe.
Step forward.
Breathe.
Try to answer Rudy's incessantly distracting questions.
Breathe.
Repeat.

I was SO proud of myself that I did it!! Sure, it took about 30 minutes to do, but I DID IT!!!
And I'm glad. It was kinda fun. KINDA.

Afterwards, we drove down to the harbor to see the "Victory Kiss" statue. I've been wanting to see it for a while, and luckily a friend told me exactly where to find it. Of course, we couldn't see it all too well because it was about midnight. But it was still cool to see. There were also statues to celebrate all that Bob Hope did in the USO. The shape and sculpture of the statues were so lifelike. It was kinda freaky. But it was a nice tribute to Bob.
All in all, it was a fun night! It was a very cool San Diego night!! I sometimes forget how LUCKY, BLESSED and FORTUNATE I am to live in such an AWESOME city!!! I couldnt be any luckier to call this place home. Love it!

Ponder. Meditate. Reflect.

2012-01-27T18:50:00.000-08:00

There is no need to run outside

For better seeing;

Nor to peer from a window. Rather abide

At the center of your being;

For the more you leave it, the less you learn.

Search your heart and see

If she is wise who takes each turn;

The way to do is to be

-Lao Tzu

Tao Te Ching, Verse 47

In the works......

2012-01-24T00:53:00.000-08:00

*I had an interview for an office manager position today. I hope I get it? Yes, that's a question mark. I also applied, tested and currently in the background check process for a position with the Sheriff's department. I wish the process went A LOT faster. I'm afraid to accept this office manager position and then a week later be notified for the Sheriff's dept. I'd hate to leave him in a lurch. Don't get me wrong, I'm truly grateful for both job opportunities! Oh to be an adult and "get to" make such grown up decisions!

*Church..... I'm not feeling this new ward that I've been attending since October. I feel out of place and like a constant visitor there. I don't feel at home there. Whenever I visit ANY of the wards of my home stake, I'm welcomed with hugs and warm greetings. Plus, I'm tired of driving 20 miles, one way, just to go to church. I think a possible ward change is in the works.... Also, as I've been working with the YW from my home ward, during their Volleyball season, I can't help but want a calling in YW or Primary. I miss having a high demand calling.

*Today is Chinese New Year. It's my FAVORITE holiday!! Seriously, I love this day!!

Enjoyed a delicious Chinese dinner with the family and traded lil red envelopes.

*Life.....is hard! I am realizing that more and more. It feels like constant "sink or swim" moments. I've come to learn that as long as my nostrils are above water, every so often, I'll survive. Breathe, Ehu...just breathe.

*I want a bike. A cool beach cruiser bike. Please & Thank You. It would come in handy....especially after last Tuesday night....in which I'll blog about later.

*And I joined Pinterest....we'll see how long that lasts.

Unexpected Visit!

2012-01-21T22:26:00.000-08:00

I received an unexpected visit from my dear friend, "Dixie"*. I met him about 5 years ago when he returned from his mission. He seemed like a quiet, chill and funny guy and he's still the same way. I love him dearly and miss him, since he lives out of state. He's just one of those guys that seem more like a cousin than just a 'guy-friend'. I guess it helps that we've never had any awkward sexual tensions because one of us liked the other. We're just kosher. :)

We went to eat at Tacos el Gordo (TJ style tacos) and then hit up the beach, walked the Imperial Beach pier and ate ice cream--in 45deg. weather. It was delightful! It's always nice to hang with Dixie, because it feels like our friendship picks up right exactly where we last left it. I'm so grateful to have him in my life and call him my friend.

*As for his nickname, that's what I actually call him in real life. Whenever he use to call me on my house phone, the caller ID popped up as "Dixie F_________", which was is his grandmother's name. It just stuck and we can't help but chuckle whenever I use it.

Valentine's Day is coming up!

2012-01-21T05:07:00.000-08:00

I was at Kohl's the other night and came across the cutest thing!! It was a lil pink owl statuette for Valetine's day!! Oh man, I sooooooooooooooo loved it!! I wanted it!! I still want it!! But I figure I'd buy it for myself when the day approaches.

But then I saw the trailer for The Vow. I wanna watch it on Valentine's Day!

So I think I've got the best gift and date..............for me.

sigh.

stupid holiday.

As Kip would say....

2012-01-16T19:55:00.000-08:00

"I LOVE TECHNOLOGY!!"

Since Friday night, I think I've been tethered to my new phone! Oh man, seriously, I LOVE MY NEW ANDROID PHONE!! I love all the apps!! I didn't know I've been living under a [technological] rock! Embarrassing, but true!

And now...

I'm addicted to Words with Friends!! Seriously, it's pathetic, ESPECIALLY since I LOATHE playing Scrabble.

My favorite part, thus far, was being able to go to church with just Carmex, gum and my phone in my pocket.[It was always a goal of mine since I was RS Pres and would show up to church with heavy bags.] Gotta love being able to download the scriptures and manuals on my phone! SO FRIGGIN AWESOME!! I LOVE IT!!

Connected!!!

2012-01-13T21:33:00.000-08:00

Good News: I have a phone again!!

Bad News: I lost ALL my contacts!!

So if you're reading this, and we're friends that actually talk to each other...most like I will be needing your number again.

Please & Thank You.

Disconnected.

2012-01-12T05:02:00.000-08:00

My phone broke.

So if you've tried to call or text me, it's because the screen died.

Don't know how it happened, but I pulled it out of my purse and the screen wouldn't turn on.
Adios to ALL the numbers/contacts in my phone.

As much as I was hoping to buy a new phone,

I didn't want to do it this week.

Because....

My car died.

Well, not ALL the way, but I can't put it in reverse and some other "technicality"

(as in, my rotors sound HORRIBLE because "someone" HATES doing car stuff and this is what it has led to.)

UGH!!!

What does a transmission do anyways?!?

Who wishes they were made out of money right now?
answer: I do!

Just the Sunday I needed!

2012-01-08T23:35:00.000-08:00

Today was a pretty splendid day! I was able to attend church with one of my favorite people. He always makes any situation a thousand times better. I LOVE just talking with him, he’s so intellectually stimulating. I was SO HAPPY at church! I haven’t felt that way since I was attending my YSA ward. I felt real again! I wasn't just going through the motions of church. I actually laughed in church--more than a nice little “church chuckle” to be courteous. I had a comfortable friend by my side, again. I couldn’t have been more grateful. I just couldn’t go through another Sunday like last week. Today was a million times better!! God knows how thankful I am for Mr. Red! I hope to be a better friend to others because of his selfless and giving heart.

I was blessed to spend time with my sister and the kids. I miss having noise in the house. I miss hearing their voices and all their musical noises. I miss hugging them every time I’d see them around the house. I also got to take a nap on our old comfy couch. I forgot how much I loved that couch. It felt like home again. I’ve tried not to think much about my old house and how much I’ve missed it. In all honesty, I’ve tried to forget it because it hurts too much to think about it. I nodded off while my nephew Sim was saving the world through some Xbox game. When I woke up, I felt like I was back in my old childhood home again. I felt that comfort of home and family once more.

Since Mr. Red picked me up for church and dropped me off at my sister’s, I had my nephew Sim take me home. On the way, we picked up his youngest brother, “Kalanster" [sidenote: on the radio, I heard Christina Perri’s song, A Thousand Years--LOVE this song!! It's my new favorite song!!] I was telling them both about a new and VERY delicious taco stand that was way better than our usual taco shop that we go to. We just happened to be driving down the very street that the taco stand was on, and I asked that we stop. I’m so glad we did and even more excited that they both enjoyed it a lot! But more than that, I had a blast just spending time with them. I seriously think I’m beyond blessed with the AWESOME nephews and niece that I have. The boys were making me laugh soooooooooooooooo much!!! As we walked up, I told Sim to place our order. I don’t know why he did it, but he started to order in Spanish. I was going to dare him to do it, but he totally did it anyways. Which was hilarious to hear anyways!! Oh man, TOO DANG FUNNY!!! And Kalanster, he’s just a funny kid anyways!! It was so hard to eat and laugh at the same time!! Makes me wish Bubba was around. Seriously, I don’t know how I lucked out to be so spoiled with such great nephews!!
Today was just the type of day that I needed! I couldn’t be anymore grateful to a loving Heavenly Father that knows exactly what we need and blesses us accordingly. Was today a "tender mercy" type of day? Indeed, it was! My heart is so full and my cup runneth over.

As of late, on this very late evening....

2012-01-08T01:28:00.000-08:00

Where to start....

-I bought a computer off of a friend of a friend. It was very inexpensive and just what I needed. Can I just say, when/if you sell your computer--WIPE THE HARD DRIVE CLEAN!!!! All pictures, videos, documents, histories, etc! Oh man, too friggin' funny! It was A LOT MORE than I could have EVER wanted to find on a computer.

-My sister & kids moved this past week. It's been a lot quieter and boring. I miss having them so close, but it's a good move and they're only 10 minutes away. I appreciate their generious hospitality.

-My ward.......SIGH. Last Sunday was hard, really, REALLY hard. The talks were on Service and one of the examples really affected me. It made me miss all my friends from my ol' YSA ward. I just wanted a good, comfortable friend to be sitting next to me. Mr. Red came to mind. I walked out during the intermediate hymn (which coincidentally was, "You Can Make the Pathway Bright" and was VERY contrary to how I was feeling) and cried in the bathroom stall. Yeah, cried in the bathroom stall like a freshman in high school......uzz. I just feel like I have ZERO friends in that ward. It still feels cold, unfamiliar and unwelcoming. I can't stand it.

-I couldn't be any more grateful that Mr. Red will be with me at church tomorrow. All I've wanted since I've started attending my new ward is to have a "comfortable friend" next to me. Someone who just knows me. This is exactly what I need tomorrow because I really don't see myself attending this ward much longer. Besides, it's Mr. Red and I always have the best times with him.

-I went to karaoke with my ol' YSA friends this past Tuesday. Oh man. I wish I had alcohol to blame my karaoke stint on. Even worse, my friend caught it all on video. Yeeeeowch!! I sang, Carly Simon's "You're So Vain." I had TONS OF FUN with them all and I'm thankful for each and everyone of them. I like the way we hug when meet and hug when we part. They warm my heart so dearly.

-Today, I had a testing for a job position with SD county. It was pretty tedious and I SERIOUSLY hope I get this job. I could DEFINITELY use it! It's in interesting field, so let's hope I get it! Wish me luck! LOTS and LOTS of GOOD luck!!

-It's getting late..............................thank heaven it's Sunday!

My 2nd Parents!

2012-01-01T03:48:00.000-08:00

They'll be here this month!! Oh I cannot wait!! I've missed them so much! More than you'll ever know!! I love Mama McK so much! She is truly my 2nd Mom. She gives it to me straight, lectures me when I need it and loves me unconditionally. I couldn't have been more grateful to have met Papa & Mama McK! They will always be my most favorite missionary couple!! I seriously cannot wait!! I'm giddy like a kid on Christmas morning!!!

Stood Up.

2011-12-29T23:13:00.000-08:00

So I THOUGHT today was gonna be a good day....

...and then I got stood up for my date with Berkeley, tonight.

Yeah, didn't think that was going to happen since he was the one complaining last Friday night about being stood up for his date that night.

WOW.

I'd be more mad or pissed, but honestly, I stopped getting my hopes up about dates and whatnot.

Besides, I've been trying to be 'less invested' with certain friendships and relationships.

Tonight's events don't really make me want to try to ask Oeste out again.

Really, do I want to be shot down again?

A heart can only handle so much.

This

why

cannot

stand

dating

!!!

All the B.S. games and drama.

Why can't it just be easy, like;

I like you.

Do you like me?

Ok, let's do something about it.

Done!

Dear God,

I hope I don't die

single...

or alone,

or a virgin.

Amen.

ok, I take that back.... I am pissed. Who can't pick up a damn phone and call....or hell, at least drop a text.

If I could...

2011-12-28T21:35:00.000-08:00

I would elope.

I would run off to the Laie, Hawaii LDS temple with my fiance and get married.

Then we'd spend our Honeymoon in Maui--my favorite place on earth.

I wouldn't tell anyone. I think it'd be fun! Go off on a "vacation" with my fiance and just tie the knot.

I think there's something so romantic about doing that--just the two of you. At the end of the day, it'll just be you two...why not start it off that way?

I have mixed feelings about having people at a wedding. I always feel like the officiator, no matter what religion, speaks more to the wedding guests than to the couple. I think more intimate and sacred things would be shared, if only the couple was present. I don't want a big crowd at my actual ceremony. I think it's a more intimate, private affair. If I could truly have it my way, I'd want only my fiance and myself there, with the officiator, of course.

Then once we were back in San Diego, we'd celebrate it BIG!!!! With GREAT FOOD and GOOD MUSIC!! And all of our family and friends around!!

Yep, that's how I would do it.

LIVE IT UP!!

2011-12-27T22:08:00.000-08:00

I've had this poem on my mind lately. I feel like I've been existing and not LIVING. I need to do more LIVING and not just floating through life. Enjoy this poem, it's one of my favorites....

If I Had My Life to Live Over

by Erma Bombeck
If I had my life to live over, I would have talked less and listened more.
I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded.
I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.
I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.
I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.
I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.
I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains.
I would have cried and laughed less while watching television - and more while watching life.
I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.
I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.
I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.
Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, "Later. Now go get washed up for dinner."
There would have been more "I love you's".. More "I'm sorrys" ...
But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute... look at it and really see it ... live it...and never give it back.

The Gift of GIVING.

2011-12-27T01:03:00.000-08:00

As I've been attending the Pacific Beach ward, I've come to learn more about Giving.

One of my favorite Sunday school teachers bears testimony about how he gives every time he can. If he doesn't have anything to give, he feels it in his heart that if he did have something he would give it. I like his example. I need to be more like that. And I tried, one day, not too long ago....

I was walking into Vons and tried to look preoccupied so I could avoid the person who was asking for a handout. I didn't want to turn down another person because I NEVER have cash on me. I can't stand turning someone down. I feel terrible. As I was shopping, I thought I'd get some food from the deli for the person outside. Once I was outside, he was no where in sight! Nor did I even know what he looked like, exactly--since I didn't look up, while walking in. My fault. I circled the parking lot--nothing. I was so disappointed. Why didn't I tell the stranger to just wait for a few minutes til I came back out? Why didn't I acknowledge him? I went home and ate the food, but it didn't taste good at all, knowing that it was never intended for me.

A woman in my ward was sharing an experience she had recently about taking a friend to the airport. After she dropped her off, she took a box of Cuties (oranges) and passed them out downtown to homeless people. In Relief Society, the teacher shared a scripture with us;

"...Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me." -Matt. 25:45

She emphasized the word, "not". It made me think, what have I NOT done to others? I thought about my Sunday school teacher, I thought about the man at Vons, and all the other people I see on the side of the road with their cardboard signs.

Every morning, when I head into the office, I always see a man at the last stoplight before the office. I always feel bad because I have nothing to give him. But I made a decision, I would start to grab an extra fruit when I pack my lunch, so I could give him something. I couldn't help but think of the above scripture. When I was denying him food, I was denying serving Christ. I've decided to make a more a conscious effort to be more giving.

This past weekend, my nephew Sim reminded me of one of his favorite service moments. It was a time, when I went out with my nephews to pick up pizza for dinner. I forgot about that time, but I'm grateful for his reminder. We went to Lil' Cesars to pick up pizzas for the family. However, we headed back in as I asked my nephews if "they wanted to do something cool!" I remember they all agreed and lit up. We got another pizza and headed over to where several homeless people communed together. I remember once we got back to the car, they were happy and a lil more quiet. My nephew, then a teenager, said that it really affected him, and he often shared that experience on his mission. I'm glad he reminded me of that incident.

After shopping this past Saturday, my niece and I grabbed some Lil Cesars pizza, and finished all but 3 slices. We tried to give it away, but couldn't find anyone. We were sad. We even drove around to find people....no luck.

But I won't let it stop there. This is my goal for life... and not just a goal for the holiday, or for the year. I plan on never taking home 'left overs'/doggy bags. My goal is to give it away to someone less fortunate, so that I can help someone not go to sleep hungry, at least for one night. It's the least I can do for another.

"Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me."

Christmas Eve!

2011-12-24T15:28:00.000-08:00

Oh man! Today's Christmas eve.... so much to do and enjoy!

*I'll become the best of friends with scotch tape & wrapping paper. Let's hope I make it out without any cuts!
*I hung out, for the first and last time, with W.Anthony last night. Now I know why I shouldn't date 25-year-olds...or at least this 25-year-old! Within the first 5 minutes he was demeaning and rude with his teasing. LAAAAAAAAAME!!! Needless to say, I will NOT be calling him back!

*On a happier note, I'll be going out on a date with Berkeley. Last night, he called me complaining about the women in his YSA ward flaking out on dates with him. Berkeley's a really nice guy, intelligent, spiritual, RM, college educated and going back for his Masters in Law, cute, beautiful blue/hazel eyes and lovely smile---quite the catch! My only gripe about Berkeley is that he talks soooooooooooooooooo much!! But he does listen and has a great memory, so at least there's a trade off. Well, he called me and was majorly bummed. I asked him how he felt about dates and if a woman asked him out on a date, who would pay. I was kinda joking, thinking he'd know I was teasing, but he seriously said that a man should always pay. Well, I waited about 2 minutes then said, "Do you have any plans next Friday?"

"No"

"I was wondering if you'd like to go out on a date with me, to Berta's"

"YES!"

I was shocked by his immediate response! But I seriously thought he would have known that I was slightly joking--I wanted to see if he'd catch me trying to score dinner off of him [I would have paid for my own dinner]. But then he made a comment, which now I know that it's a date. So here's to Berta's next Friday!!

*I'll be singing in my ol' YSA ward tomorrow. I'm nervous just because our quartet hasn't practiced together and I don't know if the 2 other girls even know the song. Ugh...... I hope it doesn't bomb. I'm just excited to see all my friends!! I miss them so much!!

*I'm stoked to decorate cookies with my niece tonight. Or maybe tomorrow, since I'm lagging on wrapping gifts.

*It's 3:30pm and I haven't eaten anything all day......dang, this is gonna be a looooooooong night!

Merry Christmas Eve!!

Bub & Oeste

2011-12-21T21:42:00.000-08:00

This past weekend, my nephew Bub and his fiancee came into town for a few days. It was a very nice visit. I enjoyed having them here and actually miss them, a lot. We got to eat at one of their favorite places here in San Diego, Bronx Pizza! For thin crust/NY pizza, it was REALLY DELICIOUS!!! We tried going there a year ago, but they closed early for a Christmas Eve party and we ended up at the taco shop next door. :( Major bummer... but it was definitely worth waiting a year for!
I had tons of fun with them and I'm grateful to have spent time with both of them!! It was a great weekend!! I can't wait to have them back down here again.
On another note... I did talk to Oeste on Monday night. After FHE, we talked out in the parking lot, in the rain, for 2 hours. Well, it wasn't exactly raining, but it was sprinkling and we were standing under a tree. It was kinda sweet. [cheesy & lame, I know] We talked about a lot of different things. My feet practically had frostbite, but it was ALL worth it! :) I liked talking with him, he's really funny and he's smart! Such a hot combo!
Did I ask him? Well......... yes, I did. Did he say "yes"? Nope. Well, he didn't exactly say "no"....but it's because he left for home today and won't be back til the new year, so I won't be able to complete my last December 2011 goal with him [go to the top of the Hyatt]. So that was my 2nd time I tried to ask him out. The first time wasn't exactly direct, so I'll give him a pass... but I don't know if I want to ask again. He's a REALLY nice guy and his humor always makes me chuckle. I think he's so endearingly cute and he's intelligent!! He speaks Spanish and has a cute lil smile!! TOTAL SWOON WORTHY!! But I don't know.... we'll see, when I see him in 2 weeks. Siiiiiiiiiiiiigh.

T-minus 6 days til Christmas!

2011-12-19T14:52:00.000-08:00

Man, I hate cramps. A LOT!!! TMI? Hmm....
I wish men would experience cramps. I mean, what's the worst that they go thru? They go bald. Really, is that the worst that it can get for them? GEEZ!!! Damn cramps.

*My song was....ok. Those dang G notes are way too dang high.
*I got talk with Oeste for a while after church. SWOON!! Oh I think he's so endearingly cute!! I MIGHT ask him out tonight. I'm NERVOUS.
*My dear sweet friend, Britty, just got engaged this weekend! I couldn't be anymore happy for her! Hello June wedding in Utah!
*I love my best friend StephyPooh [now MamaSteph]! Our phone calls are ALWAYS so funny! Like, laugh-til-you-cry funny. She's been the highlight of my day.
*My weekend was SPECTACULAR!! Had the GREATEST time with my nephew Bub & his fiancee!! It was a good "nephew" weekend. I'm so blessed with the BEST nephews anyone could ask for! (and niece too!)
*Did I mention how nervous I am to ask Oeste out?!? JINKIES!! He's so funny, kind and all around GOOD! We were talking about the word, "ASSUME". And I told him the break down of it and he said he's never said the "A" word. Wow... that's good, in my book.

Good luck to me & Gesu Bambino!

2011-12-18T02:01:00.000-08:00

Man...oh man!
Tomorrow at church, I'll be singing, Gesu Bambino, in a duet. Typically, I wouldn't mind singing at church....but......

See that VERY top note of "G", that's what I've gotta sing up to! Lately, my voice has not been hitting those so nicely. It's screechy!! In the duet, I'll be singing the higher of the two voices. I'm getting really nervous because I don't know what to do. I'm trying to remember all that Hermana R has taught me, but I'm honest to goodness nervous! Especially since I've gotta sing that note, at least, twice during a solo part. MAN!! AAAAHHHHHHH!!! PLUS, it doesn't help that I'm bloated [read: menstruating]. Hermana R told me that Opera singers sign a contract saying that they cannot perform during their menstruation. The female body retains water during that time (we already know this), and it also retains water in the vocal chords, thus altering the singing voice. Don't believe me? Here's a link.

Good luck to me.
Hope I don't embarrass myself TOO badly. Oh man....and Oeste will be there.

Wish me LOTS and LOTS of luck!!

A 6am Quickie...on Dec. 14!

2011-12-14T06:20:00.000-08:00

-This past weekend wasn't ANYTHING like this weekend....

-My [home] stake choir did well on musical pieces. I LOVE singing with the Chula Vista stake choir. I LOVE watching Hermana R lead music. She's graceful in the way she moves her fingers, hands and arms. Yet it's also powerful the way she a choir and accompanists at her command. Love it! Love her!

-Work... Oh, I LOVE work! Work is wonderful! Even when it gets close to being 'stressful', it really isn't. Sure, I felt a lil overwhelmed yesterday but I didn't feel stressed or upset about it. Gotta love 'To-Do' lists.

-This past Monday was my first FHE in my new FHE Committee chairman (chairperson? woman? whatevers!). Can I just say, I'm glad I have a committee. I'm glad to know that there's a lot of good help available. I can't wait to meet them all. And with that said, I need some good, inexpensive, and fun FHE activity ideas. Now when I say, "inexpensive", I mean 'free' because I don't feel like forking over my paycheck every other Monday. Oh yeah....and it has to be approved by the Bishop first. My thoughts on that later....

-Had a very enlightening & emotional conversation with Mr. Red the other day. I'm so thankful that he 'gets' me, that I don't have to say much (or even anything at all) and he senses what I'm feeling and thinking. I'm eternally grateful for his friendship.

-I've got my work meeting today with Mulligan. Oh man... and in the meanwhile, Oeste will be at my office for a meeting. Fortunately/Unfortunately I've gotta go up to my office after my meeting's over. I only say "unfortunately" because...

-I'm tired of commuting in the rain. What usually takes 20 minutes to get to work now takes over an hour. Dang drivers who don't know how to slow down when driving in the rain. That is my ONLY complaint about San Diego---we don't know how to drive in the rain. GRR!!!

-ok anyways... I've gotta get some work done before work. Happy Wednesday! And my nephew Bub comes to town today! Happy day!

Pearl Harbor Day 2011

2011-12-07T21:20:00.000-08:00

-My goals: 2 down, 3 to go! I'm so stoked! I'll post pictures when I've completed them ...or I'll post at least one of them ;)

-I hung out with Mr. Red last night. I told him that we needed to talk. There was something on my mind that I needed to be open about. It's something that I never wanted to address, but I needed to finally tell him about it. My pride and vanity were always stopping me. I rehearsed what I was going to say and even went over it with my best friend. In the end, he was the same caring Mr. Red and I made a big deal out of nothing. It was such a relief because I even stuffed my pockets full of kleenex cause I predicted A LOT of tears. So now, this man knows me just as well as my lifelong best friend, Bugs. Sometimes it scares me because I've known Bugs my whole life and I've only known Mr. Red for the last year and a half. It's easy to be open with him [excluding the above situation] and he reads me so well. He just gets me. SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGH! Oh this man........
-I received 2 callings, this past Sunday. One of them is the assistant ward bulletin (person? specialist? whatever it's called) and the other I'm REALLY stoked/nervous about! I'll blog more about that after Sunday. I can't wait!
-I'm really enjoying my job! I love what it's about and just the ambience of work. It's fun, chill and I feel like I'm making a difference in people's lives.
-Can I just say, I'm LOOOOOOOOVING Robin Thicke's new album, Love After War?!? It's chill & sensual...such a great combo! "Dangerous" is my faaaaave! HOT!
-I had a work meeting with Mulligan today. I found out from a friend that he's kinda interested in some chick who lives in AZ. Eh, that's cool...whatevers. Mulligan's really nice and sometimes I get SO nervous talking to him. Damn, those baby blues! ;)
-BTW, I LOVED Inception! Such a TRIPPY/AWESOME movie!! Plus, it didn't hurt to watch it on Blu-ray...especially 4 feet away from the screen. I can't wait to watch it again!
-I heard from Ras!!! Awww, Ras! He sounds so positive and he's already changing (for better). I miss him but I know he's exactly where he needs to be right now. I can't wait til Hermanita comes home in 6 months!!! YAAAAAAAAY!!!!
-Tomorrow's Thursday. Oh I love me some Thursday! HAPPY THURSDAY!

PB ward Christmas party & Vans.

2011-12-03T02:25:00.000-08:00

-It's 12:45pm.

-I'm drinking the BEST cup of HoCho, EVER!! It's by Nestle and I added two packets-thats' the way to go!! ♥

-I love cracked wheat! Try it! The texture is fun!

-I saw Oeste tonight at my ward Christmas party. I asked him if he knew of any good places for Pho. It was a brief conversation about Pho and where to have some. I guess he couldn't tell what I was trying to hint at. :-/ Do I even try to attempt to ask him, directly? Ugh.... I don't know...we'll see.

-So my new ward friend, "Vans" was also at the Christmas party. He came over to talk to me and it was cool getting to know him more. He studied Psychology and works in that field. I asked him if he's assessed me. He has. I asked him to share it with me. He said that I live my religion, but I don't make it my entire life. I like that, I believe it. He said that I'm easy going and friendly. True and true! I told him I was a lil worried he'd tell me negative things, but wanted him to tell me his brutal honest opinion anyways. He said he likes to be positive with his assessments since so many people think Psychology is just negative. It was good. I think it'd be way cool to chill with him sometime. He attended BYU-Hawaii, so I definitely think there's some "hang loose" in him. Small world, he knows Berkeley. They grew up in the same ward and live out in east SD. Vans suggested that I make it more of a habit to drive to east county to visit Berkeley. I don't really want to, since it's about a 45 minute drive. Berkeley and I meet up when it's convenient for both of us. Kinda weird to throw out there, Vans.....

-My nephew, Sim & niece, Novee went by Mr. Red's tonight. She invited him over for dinner. Bless her heart! :) She's been wanting me to cook for him, again. My family has all taken a liking to Mr. Red. Can't blame them, he is pretty spectacular! When he interacts with them, he makes them feel like they're the most important person on the planet. I know this. He does it to me all the time. I'm pretty dang lucky, I know.

Goals: Before & During 2012!

2011-12-02T12:33:00.000-08:00

As I was lying awake in my bed at 3am, this morning, I started to think of some of the things I would like to accomplish before 2012 and during 2012. Just so I can reflect back on it, I thought I'd post it here.

BEFORE 2012: (so basically, within the next 29 days--TOTALLY doable!)

Watch Inception.
Go to the top of the Hyatt hotel. (It's 40 floors up and has a beautiful view of SD...from what I hear)
Eat Pho.
Read another book.
Eat at Bronx Pizza.

I really want to do all of those before 2012. Luckily, Mr. Red just bought the Blu-ray version of Inception off of Amazon, so that goal will be completed soon. When my nephew, Bub/Kea, comes to visit we'll FINALLY go eat at Bronx. As for the others... I'm thinking of asking Oeste out to either Pho or the Hyatt..or both? :) We'll see.

DURING 2012: My "12 in 12" goals! (It's still a work in progress, this is what I have so far)

Visit Maui.
Get my passport.
Pursue a relationship.
See my best friend StephyPooh & Britty.
Finish Les Miserables.
Find out what's so great about running/jogging {by doing it myself...pray for me.}

So that's where I'm at, so far...... I'm really stoked for these goals. I love the sense of accomplishment! Besides, it's good to work towards something...that's the point to this life, right? :) Good luck to me!

Tearful Tuesday...Mr. Red & Ras.

2011-11-30T14:21:00.000-08:00

Last night, my nephew Sim & I went over to Mr. Red's for dinner. On Sunday, Sim & Mr. Red were talking about his Vespa, that he doesn't really use. Sim's been in need of his own mode of transportation since coming home from his mission, in August. Part of the reason why Sim was invited over was so he could discuss the (2006, great condition) Vespa and a possible sale. After dinner the discussion started and ended with Mr. Red giving Sim his Vespa for an EXTREMELY generous price. Let's just say it's BEYOND generous. He practically gave Sim the Vespa, but Sim felt he should give him something, at least...so he offered everything he had in his wallet. $5. FIVE DOLLARS! And Mr. Red accepted it. Sim had a perma-grin, from ear to ear. I think we were both in shock. I was floored at his charitable offer and kind act. Mr. Red couldn't have bestowed such generosity upon a more humble and grateful person, like Sim. While Sim was out riding around, Mr. Red & I talked, on his uber-comfy couch. However, I was uncommonly quiet. The fortunate thing about Mr. Red is that silence between us is A-Ok, it's not uncomfortable because he knows I'm [usually] contemplating and reflecting on something. Last night was a little different, I was awfully quiet and I couldn't understand why, yet Mr. Red was patient, as always.

After Sim & I got home, I was texting with Ras. He's usually the last person I communicate with at night and it's become a common thing for him to wish me, "boa noite, doces sonhos" (good night, sweet dreams). Sometimes, my day would start with a "Bom dia!" text. After going back and forth for a bit, it really started to hit me that my friend was leaving for 2 years. Two WHOLE years. It hit me hard, really hard. While Mr. Red was away on deployment for several months, Ras became the friend I needed and grew closer to. After my "Ras is leaving for two years" realization, the water works started and wouldn't stop. I cried because I was going to miss my friend so much! I don't always see Ras' the callous side that so many other see. I'm fortunate enough to see the kind, caring and sensitive Ras that he rarely lets others know about. While I was Relief Society president, he sustained me in so many ways. When I felt down in the dumps about stuff, I'd turn to him and he'd uplift my spirits and heart. Yeah, I liked him at one time, but at the heart of it all, we were always friends. So when I say I'm going to miss him, I'm going to miss my good friend who's been there when I didn't allow others to see my weak or vulnerable side, my friend who never got annoyed at my antics and my friend who's just fun to be around.
I started to think of the transaction that occurred between Mr. Red and Sim. How in the world was Mr. Red really going to give Sim the Vespa for free?! How is someone just so giving and willing to accept $5 for a 5 year old, great condition motor scooter?! And on top of that, giving him the helmet and riding gloves too!? I couldn't wrap my mind around it. This guy who practically gave away his Vespa is my friend...not just some random good guy from a random heart warming story, but my friend who I'm tremendously blessed to know. I wept more, my heart was bursting at the seams and I couldn't stop the tears. My mind and heart was in awe that Heavenly Father would bless my life with such giving, compassionate and selfless friends. Knowing and realizing this was overwhelming, last night. I'm truly grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who knows what types of friends I need in my life and blesses me with such heaven sent angels. My cup runneth over!!

The perma-grin happy new Vespa owner.

(and yes, even as I was typing this the water works were slighly flowing. I can't help it, my heart is bursting with gratitude!)

Dating, Marriage and Hope.

2011-11-26T04:03:00.000-08:00

I really feel like writing in my journal tonight. However, I'm staying at a friend's during this Thanksgiving weekend and I left it at home. I'm a lil bummed about it, because I like to take my journal with me wherever I'm staying. I like to write in it, at the end of my day, right before I go to bed. It's how I unwind, at night. Since I don't have my journal...this is the next best thing. I hope I don't get too TMI, but I have stuff on my mind. Stuff that I've been thinking of for the last couple days...several weeks... for a while.
Well, as previously mentioned, I'm in a Singles adult ward (no longer in a young single adult ward). From talking with friends, I hope I don't "retire" from another ward. I've been thinking a lot about dating & marriage.
I'm tired of being single. I envy my friends who are married with kids... oh how I wish I could be living that life and feeling like I'm actually accomplishing the purpose of this life. Sometimes I wonder, "Do my married friends feel sorry/pity on me because I'm not married with children, like they are?" A couple of my married friends say they wish they could trade places with me; single, free to come & go with ease, do whatever I want, etc. I guess the 'grass seems greener on the other side.'
I'd really like to experience marriage, in this lifetime. I'd like to experience motherhood and the blessing of pregnancy, feeling life growing within me. I'm tired of being alone. I miss being in a relationship, having someone by your side is an amazing feeling. What do I miss the most about being in a relationship? Geez, where do I begin? I miss those 'inside' jokes. I miss someone who just 'gets me', because that means a lot to me... where I don't have to explain why I do/say stuff because they just know me so well. I miss physical affection, people need to be touched. I learned a lot about that while in massage college. It's true. People need hugs and just good physical touch (I don't necessarily mean sex, I'm sure that's good too... I wouldn't know, yet). I miss holding hands, having a warm arm around me, a safe & secure arm to hold while walking, the closeness of two faces, allowing/desiring someone to be in your 'personal space', a good guy hug, cuddling... I crave [good] physical touch. I miss the closeness, security and intimacy a relationship provides. I miss sharing my most tender feelings and deepest thoughts, allowing myself to trust someone enough to be vulnerable. Most of all, I miss saying, "I love you" and knowing you mean it more than when you say it to all others in your life.
I really miss being in a serious relationship. Sometimes I wonder if I'm ready to be in one, again. Part of me says 'no' because I want to offer him my very best self. I want to give him the best me; physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, intellectually and all other "-ly's". There are some areas that I know I can and should improve on. Of course I'd want to give my best self because I'm hoping that there's a man out there that has those same intentions, as well. I hope I get to be married in the temple, someday. Honestly, I'm getting a little sick and tired of being the lone single at so many church activities and friends' events. As much as I LOVE going to the temple, it seems like everyone there has on a wedding ring. :( I just wonder, "When is it going to be my turn?" I hate thinking that question because it brings tears to my eyes, every time. I also wonder, "Did I somehow raise my hand in the pre-mortal existence agreeing to live a life without marriage and children???" I get tired praying about it, because I feel like I'm hitting my head against a brick wall. I know that all things are done in the Lord's time and will, but I have a hard time convincing my poor heart. I wish I could just know with a surety if I'm to be married in this lifetime or not. I can't help but sigh and try to put it in the furthest part of my mind and heart, put a smile on my face and try to be okay with it all....because quite honestly, I'm not. I can't convince my heart any more because it hurts trying to hope for something that doesn't seem like it's ever going to happen. Will I forever be 'aunt Ehu who never got married'? I think I just might be. Oh well.

"Age appropriate" clothes?

2011-11-26T01:05:00.000-08:00

Tonight, I was reading the newspaper, skimming over store ads and "window shopping" online. I started to think about stuff I wear and how I wish I could/would dress. I know I'm 31 year old (man, I still don't like saying that aloud :( ) and I don't think, feel or act like a 31 year old....maybe I look like it? Gosh, I hope not... maybe I really should start wearing SPF +1000 on my face?
Well anyways, back to my point...
In my ideal world, I would wear:

With jeans, cute cardigans and accessories, of course! You know, so I don't look like I'm 15 or something.

**I guess I posted this for more reasons than one.... I'm kinda not the best dresser. I'm either too casual or too over the top. I wish I could live in board shorts, hoodie sweaters and Reef slippers--but I can't, as much as I'd like to think I can, living in San Diego. I just wish I was one of those "cutesy" type of dressers.... *sigh* someday.... :)

As of late, in late November...

2011-11-23T23:58:00.000-08:00

-I now work closer to the temple, which is a blessing, because it's easier to keep my goal of attending the temple once a week.
-Yep, I said, "work"... and how many people do you know get these:

on their first day on the job? It was such a nice surprise! I love flowers!! Especially Gerbers, they remind me of my best friend, StephyPooh.
-So I like this new job. So far, it's really nice and chill. I enjoy my coworkers. It's only temporary until I hear back from the county.
-I had a work meeting with "Mulligan" yesterday. Oh man, Mulligan.... He has such GORGEOUS blue eyes!! I couldn't stop looking at them! And his smile is adorably cute!! My friend PF's been giving me the 411 on him and says he's a pretty genuine guy. Oh yeah! I just remembered, I talked to Mulligan on the phone today! I was calling for his assistant, but he answered.
Me: Hi "Mulligan", it's Ehulani, is Terry available?
Him: Hi! No she's not, she's out today.
Me: Oh..ok.
Him: Yeah, she's normally off on Fridays & Saturdays
(silence.....thinking he'd realize what day it was.)
Me: Um.....today's not Friday, nor Saturday....soooooo will you be expecting her later today?
Him: (starts chuckling) Today's not Friday, is it? Dang Thanksgiving is just messing me up today!
Me: (also chuckling) Nope, it's not, but it's messing me up also.
I'm just so glad it wasn't me that messed up during the phone call. I would have been totally mortified!
-I've made it a goal to attend the temple, at least once a week. So far, so good. I love it! I feel a difference. I've also loved reading the General Conference issue of the Ensign. The talks mean so much more to me, now that I've had the time to study them.
-Tomorrow's Thursday AND Thanksgiving! This is awesome!! My two favorite days in ONE!
-I was texting with Mr. Red, today. I've missed him. We haven't seen each other lately. I miss people when I don't see them in real life. He's one of those people. His birthday was a couple weeks ago, this is what I gave him:

Cool right?! I mean, how awesome is it to have your very own bowling ball with your name already engraved in it?! Ok...random find though. My nephew, Sim, and I were 'thrifting' one day, and Sim randomly came across it!! So it was EVEN cooler that we RANDOMLY found this at a thrift store, with his unique name already engraved in it! Plus I love the color, it's about the same color as his eyes. Anyways, I'm glad I'll get to see Mr. Red this Sunday, it's been more than a month since I've last seen him. :(
-Life is pretty good. I'm glad to be living life a little more than I haven't been.
-I love this place! I can't get enough of it!:

....and maybe I'm jumping the gun and cursing myself, but I think I might enjoy Christmas this year. I was listening to Christmas music as I drove to work this morning. Quite a shocker, since I hate Christmas and don't like listening to Christmas music before Thanksgiving. Oh man... we shall see.

Thanksgiving at the Beach!

2011-11-19T23:59:00.000-08:00

I made some of Mama McK's cinnamon rolls for my ward's "Thanksgiving at the Beach" party, today. I was pleased with them! Oh, I love Mama McK so much!! I think I feel a 'Gratitude List' post comin'....
Invited Berkeley and got to spend the day with him....

...at my ward party and then at the temple, waiting for his mom. So much fun!! I love Berkeley!
While waiting for her, I took some pictures. These were my favorites! Oh I love the temple so much!

I had a wonderful time in the temple this evening. Came across ol' friends from my ol' temple shift. It was like a beautiful blessing from the Lord...a treat to come across kind, familiar faces. I love when He blesses me with those tender mercies.
Today was one of those days that makes me TRULY love living in San Diego, having the friends I have and just being ALIVE! Awesome, awesome day!!

Friends, Work & Stuff.....

2011-11-18T16:18:00.000-08:00

-Wow, what a cool, wonderful week....makes me feel a lil randi.....
-I can't believe it's Friday and I start work on Monday. I'm stoked...and a lil nervous. But more stoked than nervous. I'm especially giddy about my 2nd day at work! :) More on that later....
-I can't get enough of this blog. It makes me look forward to motherhood with anticipation and enthusiasm. She's so positive and uplifting about life, family and everything in between. LOVE IT!
-I got to hang with my ol' CV5 (ward) friends this week. I truly love them and am grateful for their friendship. They mean so much to me.
-Oh how I love cardigans!! I wish I had one in EVERY shade & color! Or at least dark purple and mustard yellow, to start off with....
-Tomorrow is my new ward's "Thanksgiving at the beach" in La Jolla. I'm kinda excited about it. I'm thankful Berkeley said he'd go with me. It's nice to have a friend at this functions.
-My sister comes home on Sunday. I'm glad. I love my sister and couldn't be more grateful to have her in my life. (sidenote: she's actually my sister-in-law...well, to be technically correct, she's my ex-sister-in-law, but to me, she'll always be my sister). My hat goes off to her and all mothers, especially single parents. Parenting is a hard enough task, so to do it alone, that is quite a feat. She's blessed with children who love and appreciate her.
-Hmmm.... I think that's all I have on my mind right now. Can I just say how STOKED I am for Monday! Wow, it'll be here before I know it! I'm so excited, I want to go put my outfit together! Geez, I sound like it's my first day of school or something.... anyways... Happy Weekend! :)

Gratitude List: Ras.

2011-11-16T01:35:00.000-08:00

This is my friend, Ras. He'll be leaving in a week & a half for Brasil, for the next two years. I feel like he just received his mission call, back in June and now November's already here and he's leaving. I feel so sad... yet another friend who's leaving for a mission.
Ras & I were texting back and forth tonight. Maybe it was because of the emotional part of the movie I was watching or because it's starting to hit me that he's leaving in 11 days, but I sent him a really heartfelt text. I expressed my deep appreciation of him and his friendship. He responded with a similar text and I started to cry. I'm really going to miss my friend. He's done a lot for me, these last several months. I use to just regard him as another guy in my YSA ward and my nephew's friend. But then I got to know him, and there's a lot more than meets the eye.
He thinks of others before himself. He helps out in any and every way possible. He's dependable and loyal. While I was Relief Society president, he was ALWAYS extremely helpful. Ras has a heart of gold, one of the kindest and caring guys I could have in my life. The night I tanked in singing at stake conference, he lifted my spirits and reassured me. When I was upset over a nephew's engagement announcement on Facebook, he empathized with me. We've had some serious chats and some light hearted ones too, but he's always the same Ras, to me.
I know others would be shocked to think that he's anything but the cynical, apathetic & callous person he comes off as. There's SO much more to him. I count my lucky stars (or at least the pretty silver one he gave me for my birthday) to be his friend. I'm going to miss him, a lot.

A Year of Hair.

2011-11-15T15:34:00.000-08:00

Nov. 7, 2010

Once upon a time, I use to have looong curly hair. I enjoyed it and it made me feel pretty...especially because so many people liked it, as well. Women were envious of my free flowing curls and men wanted to touch & "crunch it" (not kidding.) This hair of mine use to be something I despised as a child because it wasn't like all the other girls. I magically, and accidentally, discovered the beauty of gel & mousse, in my last week of high school. After that, my hair turned into a blessing and not a curse.
This is a picture of me on Nov. 7, 2011 in Philadelphia, PA.
A month before my trip to Philadelphia, we were told that a woman in my ward (church congregation) had cancer, breast cancer to exact. In the month of October, we wore pretty pink ribbons at church to support this sister. As a Relief Society, we even took homemade soup to her home. In speaking with her, I was touched by her amazing strength and courage. She wasn't a "Debbie Downer" or "Negative Nancy" in the least bit. She really affected me. Knowing that she would lose her hair in a few weeks, I instantly wanted to shave my head. As Nash and I drove home, I quietly and seriously contemplated shaving my head. Sister L meant a lot to me. We weren't the closest of friends, but she was my one time Stake Young Women's president, as well as Stake Choir Director. She had touched my heart on several occasions. A week after I arrived home from the east coast, I was talking to my friend CC about the crazy idea of shaving our heads to support Sister L. CC mentioned that it would be cool if we got other people to join us. She would talk to Doc and I would ask Mr. Red. Doc was hesitant, which was lame because he already had super short hair so what would a few less centimeters of hair really do for him?!

Nov. 14, 2010

When I "asked" Mr. Red, I said,
"I think you should shave your head"
"Ok, I'll do it."
"Wow, really?"
"Yeah, but are you going to tell me why I'm shaving my head?"
and I explained and he was in, even more. Oh that's why I love Mr. Red, he's such a team player!
CC and I discussed it on a Friday and planned to do it that following Monday after FHE. I was so pumped up on the idea I wanted to do it that very day!! I couldn't find the clippers, so instead, I trimmed my hair...trimmed..cut... well it was a lot shorter:
I was LOVING this length! It was short, straight and way cute! For several months, I was debating on cutting it to this length but always hesitated. I figured I'd cut it since it was all coming off soon enough. It didn't help that I was starting to fall in love with my hair just as I was getting ready to shave it all off. Oh well, it's only hair--it grows back.
To celebrate and soften the blow of losing our hair, we had "Shave Shindig". It helped to shave it together and encourage each other... also, ice cream makes everything feel a lil nicer. Good idea, Mr. Red....

Nov. 15, 2010

So there we had it...we shaved our heads. Well, some 3 of us buzzed our heads and 2 of us bic'd it, with a shaver. They tried to talk me into it, but I wanted to enjoy it buzzed first. I was the smart one of the bunch, I brought a beanie to wear afterwards, knowing that our newly shaved/buzzed heads would be extremely sensitive to the night air. Even when I tried to fall asleep that night, for once, I did NOT enjoy a cold pillow, it was like ice!! I had to sleep with a beanie, for several weeks. In fact, I wore beanies all the time because my head was always cold and it was fall/winter. Did I regret shaving my head? Not. At. All. I loved it. I was finally able to get ready faster and as crazy as it sounds, I felt more feminine. I truly loved it. I think I felt more feminine because I had to put more effort into looking and feeling more like a lady. Blush & mascara were my new BFF's.

December 1, 2010

I eventually shaved my head a few weeks later and man alive, it felt trippy! Just like when I shave my legs and the way the feel in my sheets at night..that's how my head felt. I guess that would be called, 'sensitive'. My friend, FishLips started calling me "Haole Head". You can see why....

January 17, 2011

I did buzz my head again, on Martin Luther King day (Jan. 17). I heard Sister L's treatments were going to be for several more weeks. I wanted to continue shaving my head til her treatments were over. However, some friends and their old wives tales spooked me into thinking my hair wouldn't grow back if I continually shaved it. Funny, that only applied to my head and not my legs..?

February 2011

So I let it start growing. I found out a cool way to hide any grey hairs at this stage is to color it with mascara! :) Nice, quick remedy!

March 2011

...and then it started growing enough that I could brush it! I was so happy! I quickly brushed it into a lil faux hawk! This was after I had to go buy a brush, since I threw mine out after shaving my head. The wide bristles wouldn't have helped anyways...

April 2011 w/ newborn BabyChelo

I had to trim it around my ears a bit because it was looking a lil scraggly. If I wanted my hair to go down, I had to immediately wear a tight beanie as soon as I got out of the shower. Secret #2.

May 2011

There will be a point in which all your hair is the same length. However, the back will appear longer because it's at the lowest point of your head. If you don't trim it, it'll look like a mullet. So trim it! Trick #3.

July 2011:

June 2011

Having thick, coarse, curly hair isn't all too great when your hair is short. It's just not pretty sometimes...now I was back to using hair products. Darn, I was loing the ease off 'wash & go' hair!

And then it just started growing and growing! At times I didn't know what to do with it... Gel it? Straighten it? Scarf it? No wonder why so many men just buzz their heads, it's so EASY to deal with!

August 2011

September 2011

November 2011

October 2011

It's been fun watching it grow and learning how to handle it. Would I recommend it? Maybe. It's been nice knowing what I look like at all hair lengths. The only thing I would recommend about hair: JUST OWN IT! I received SO MANY compliments about my hair/head/appearance and how well I rocked it/pulled it off. Confidence is a BIG seller--in all things! If I acted scared or regretful, people would have treated me as such. I'm grateful for all that I experienced, learned and grew from in doing this act of love. I still love that sister dearly and I'm grateful for the friendship that came from it.

Talks, Bread & the New Ward.

2011-11-15T00:10:00.000-08:00

Well...my talk was pretty good. I was happy with it. Speaking for 20 minutes is a lil daunting, but I think I did well. I actually like speaking, it's fun...it's just everything that leads up to it, that makes me crazy/scared. Not to be confused with 'psychotic', as in 'crazy & scared'....ah, you know what I mean. Anyways, I did well and I was pleased. I'm so glad that I had a friend there in the congregation. It meant a lot to me.
I made Mama McK's bread today. I was so ecstatic! I've been wanting to make bread lately and I've been missing her....so it was a nice solution. Dang, I'm starting to crave some now!! It was my first time making bread (from scratch, without a bread maker--by hand, baby!) and I'm pleased as punch that it came out well! My family loved it! I can't wait to try her Cinnamon rolls this weekend! :( Now I miss her even more!

I'm liking my ward more and more. (I think I say that every Monday, but it's true). I like that I'm making friends with more people each time. I went to FHE tonight, since we were going to be playing Volleyball. Had a GREAT time! I saw Favre on my way in, but I guess he was leaving as I was arriving. Oh well.... However, I got to play with "Oeste" tonight. Oh I think he is so cute! And he's funny! I think what I like about Oeste is that he's not SUPER hot or gorgeous, not like what I'm use to....but his friendly, funny spirit is so attractive. I like that :)

What happened to "2 minutes" talks?

2011-11-12T22:51:00.000-08:00

Duuuuuuude, this blows. I'm sick. My eyes are sensitive and they hurt, so I KNOW that I'm sick. I keep thinking it's only a 'day cold', but it's 10pm and I still feel crappy. I just wanna sleep. Like for a whole day. Church starts at 11am, choir practice is at 10am. Plus, I also have stake choir practice at 6pm and attendance is mandatory. AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tithing. That is the topic of my talk. Easy, right? But what do you say to a congregation full of:
1. older single adults
2. lawyers
3. officers
4. doctors
5. accountants
Did I miss anyone else with Ph.D?
Who feels a lil intimidated? I do!
I think the part that I'm having the hardest time with is that I have to speak for 20 minutes. TWENTY MINUTES!!!! That's like a class lesson!! DUDE!!! I'm not nervous, I'm scared my talk is going to come up short. The Bishopric member who extended the assignment said that if my talk was short, there's a 2nd speaker and the Bishopric can always fill the remainder of the time.
Remember the good ol' days of being a youth? Reading an article from The New Era and you were done!
Oh man.......those were the days!

The 2am Post.

2011-11-12T02:45:00.000-08:00

-Just got home from dropping off a birthday present...Happy Birthday Mr. Red!

-I need to breathe and relax when certain moments become intensely heated and tumultuous.

-I feel like I keep running into a brick wall, regarding my talk for this Sunday...or in other words, for tomorrow.

-I think I may be getting sick. I'm feeling all nasel-y. I know that's not a word, but I'm having nose issues. I feel like I have to keep blowing my nose and my eyes are watering and sensitive. My face feels warm and I feel like curling up in bed, for while. Not good...considering...

-I. NEED. TO. FIGURE. OUT. SOMETHING. FOR. MY. TALK.!!!

-Hello Nyquil...........G'nite.

Thursday = Temple!

2011-11-11T12:04:00.000-08:00

Last night was simply wonderful! I was in a beautiful place surrounded by dear friends....can it get any better than that? It was a great session and I loved the silent peace that the temple offers.

It was pleasing being their with ol' ward friends as well as new ward friends. Several [new] ward members were there and it felt like a combining of worlds....old friends and new friends all in one place. "Favre" was there and it was quite the surprise! He, as always, looked goooooood. Man, he is so pleasant to look at. He's in my new ward, but I know of him from my ol' stake. Small world....

Anywhoo.... It was a very enjoyable evening. I love to see the temple...especially with loved ones.

p.s. And yes, sometimes temple trips end at In-N-Out :)

Gratitude List: Temples.

2011-11-10T09:20:00.000-08:00

Tonight, my awesome friend Drey will be going to the temple for her first time. She's really excited, which makes all of us really ecstatic for her! I also love attending the temple with dear loved ones. I'm stoked that I get to go with my nephew, Sim, tonight.

Today, I am grateful for LDS temples, especially the beautiful one we have here in San Diego. I LOVE IT!! I've loved it since I was a lil girl and read about its future construction in a newspaper article. I remember when it was being built, we would visit the site in anticipation & pure delight! I remember participating in the open house and dedication of this exquisite edifice. It is as beautiful inside as it is outside...actually, it's much much more beautiful inside. I love going to the temple because I can feel peace. How wonderful it is to feel pure peace, solitude and tranquility. I love the opportunity I have to serve those who have passed on before. I wish I could live in the temple, away from all the worries and craziness of the world. However, I'm glad I don't, it makes me appreciate the serenity of the temple so much more. I love to see the temple!

Gratitude List: Friends.

2011-11-09T20:43:00.000-08:00

I was blessed to hang out with Nash & her baby girl today. I love my dear friend Nash. She is as sweet and humble as they come. I am lucky to have such a kind friend like her. I held and played with her baby girl for most of the afternoon and it was pure joy! I love that lil girl so much! I thoroughly enjoyed my conversation with Nash today. She's so hopeful and optimistic. I love her dearly.

I love my friend Hermanita and I miss her so much! She's serving her mission in the southwest and loving it! I can't wait til she comes home in about 6 months. I miss her tons because she's just so awesome. She thinks about others without hesitation. She's the type of friend that would give you the shirt off her back . She's thoughtful in so many ways. I'm grateful to know her and lucky to have her as my friend.

When I think of all of my close friends, the thing I love the most about them is that they have a giving heart. They think of others before themselves. I am grateful for their example. They make me want to be a better person, a better friend and family member. I feel blessed beyond measure for the friends that God has put into my life. I love them all.

Gratitude List: Nov. 8

2011-11-08T15:58:00.000-08:00

In Relief Society (the women's group at church) on Sunday, we learned more about "Gratitude." One sister mentioned a 'gratitude list group' that she has amongst her friends. They email each other a list of the things they're grateful for. I thought about doing that. We'll see.

As I logged onto Blogger, I read one of my favorite blogs and started to think of the things that I'm grateful for.

Today, I'm grateful for:

-My music lessons I have with Hermana R. As I was singing next to her, my heart swelled with love and thanksgiving for this kind & talented woman. I love her.

-My car. I'm grateful to have a mode of transportation so that I can get to places with ease, comfort and [sometimes] on time.

-My own set of scriptures, in my own language. I have the freedom to read & study from them, to mark them and make notes in them. I can rely on myself to learn the gospel.

-The Banana bread my sister made. Oh I love it! She makes it about once a year and it's such a delight to savor.

Something I found on a friend's Facebook:

Ever since I read came across it, it made me start to think twice about what I pray for. What happen if such a thing came true? The morning I read this, I thought, "Well then I'd wake up with nothing because I didn't pray last night. Dang that would suck!"
Makes you think twice about praying and what you're praying for, exactly. My prayers have become more earnest and heartfelt since then. Thank God, He deserves it.

What makes a Monday morning even BETTER?

2011-11-07T11:08:00.000-08:00

1. A GOOD laugh! As I was walking into Albertsons this morning, I tripped on a mat. My sister was busy reading something, but there was a man who witnessed it all and started to smile. I didn't fall, but I did stumble around for a bit. I couldn't help but laugh out loud! I looked completely foolish, and jokingly said, "I should have just waited in the car! Happy Monday to me!" I had huge grin on my face....as well as the man who was still watching me.

2. Bob Marley music! I usually listen to my iPod in the car, but had the radio on instead. So glad! Bob Marley just makes life so much sweeter! How can you ever be in a bad mood after listening to his music?! Love him!

3. Service for others! After dropping off my sister, nephew & niece, I came home and planned on just making breakfast for myself. Instead, I made a few more fried eggs, bacon and oatmeal for my parents. It felt good to serve. They do so much for me, it's good to give back.

By golly, I think today's gonna be good day.... I can just feel it! :)

p.s. Things are getting better with my new singles ward. [Pacific Beach ward = PB] More people are remembering my name and opening up. I like that! It helped that I joined ward choir last week. However, I was asked by the music director to sing a duet for our Christmas program. I didn't know, at the time of asking, that it was to be a duet...for Gesu Bambino. I thought I knew the song...thank goodness for YouTube! OH MAN!!! And I'm singing the 1st Soprano part. Pray for me. I also got a Visiting Teaching route. I'm glad! ...and I was asked to speak next Sunday, on Tithing. Alrighty... I think I'm officially in the ward now. Mr. Red said he'd come with me, next Sunday. Hmmm....

Hermana R & vocal lessons....

2011-11-06T00:18:00.000-07:00

As I'm downloading music for my stake choir pieces, I can't help but think of my music teacher, Hermana R. Words cannot express the deep gratitude I have for her. I have been privileged to take private vocal lessons with her every week, since this past Spring. At first, I use to be terribly nervous around her. I mean, this woman has sung with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, teaches at Utah Valley University and trains the new incoming members for Mo.Tab....so in short, this woman is pretty LE-GIT! See why I would be intimidated, shy and nervous around her?! She KNOWS her stuff!! Even when I try to practice 5 minutes before my lessons, I can't hide the fact that I didn't practice that whole week before.
Over the last few months, since Mama McK was released from her mission, I grew to love Hermana R more because she was a constant & familiar person at Institute. She's taught me SO much and I'm continually blown away by the magnitude of her knowledge, talent and patience. It has a been a blessing and a heaven sent gift to receive these lessons. Oh how I wish I could sing like her! I have also been fortunate to sing in two stake choirs that she's directed. [In the spring, stake choir was in Spanish and it's funny how music knows no language barrier, we all understood what she meant when she spoke. The choir was made up of Spanish & English speakers.] She encourages me to try harder and push myself more in refining this God given talent. She warms my heart with her loving reassurance. I am thankful for a loving Heavenly Father who sent me this angel of music.

Lesson: Never Burn Bridges.

2011-11-04T07:18:00.000-07:00

I don't remember the last time I was up this early (I started this post at 6am). Not just up, but functioning. I was able to find my lost resume online and now finished with it. SO. DANG. GRATEFUL. Also grateful that Word decided to cooperate with me. HUGE PLUS!!
So this past week I've had 4 job leads. It's like the windows of heaven opened up and rained down on me. Two of them are with SD county, so I'll be testing for one of them tomorrow. The other two are with the church, one of which was a position I held before and LOVED!! It was seriously AWESOME! I loved what it was about, [all but one of] the people I worked with, the 2 mile proximity to my house, the hours, the benefits...it was just perfect! The wicked awesome part of working with ChurchJob #1, it's a shoo-in for ChurchJob#2 (my old job). ChurchJob#1 could either start in a week or in January---cross your fingers it's in a week! I want ChurchJob#2 so badly I can taste it. It's a miracle that the position is up for grabs, again.
Yesterday, I called an old co-worker from ChurchJob#2 (who's still with the company). We weren't really "co-workers" in the sense that we worked alongside each other every day, or every week. She worked at a different location in southern California, in much higher position than mine. She was my mentor and we got along very well. When I left the company 5 years ago, she was sad to see me leave, but she understood the reason. [I could no longer work with a damn dishonest, deceiving, conniving, mean-spirited co-worker]. When I talked to her yesterday, I was pleased as punch that she remembered me! I was nervous as heck, because I wasn't sure if she'd remember me or would help me out as a reference. Not only would she help me out as a reference, but she said that she would put in a very good word with the manager and (hiring) field group manager--which also use to be co-worker of mine. The awesome part of all of this is that she already put in a good word for me with my (hopefully) new manager, right after started he with the company. She told him, "it's unfortunate you never got to work the best clerk this company has ever had". Needless to say, it was a VERY good phone call! So glad I never burnt that bridge between her and I.
I really truly hope I get that position again. I've often kicked myself for walking out on that job. I really don't have many regrets in life, but this has been my biggest one.

(**update: I just found the CJ#2 manager on Facebook...damn, he's hot and single. Although some may see that as a good thing, I wish he wasn't...such a distraction!)

A foggy mind...

2011-11-03T13:01:00.000-07:00

My mind feels cloudy...or foggy, whichever one is more difficult to see through.

-I HATE doing my resume. I think it's right up there with traffic school & working on my car--I loathe those two things.

-Yesterday, I felt like I was in total B! mode. My head was pounding due to the ash and burnt smell in the air. I just felt like a crab and didn't want to be around anyone. I tried to sleep it off, but I think I woke up in a worst mood. I just stayed in my room, it's safer that way. If ever I can avoid situations where I'm mean spirited and then having to apologize for it, then I do it.

-I just need to shake this grey cloud that's over my head. FAST! SOON!!

-I'm starting to take a liking to my new ward. It's still not the same as CVYSA, but I can't keep that mentality. It's detrimental to liking and becoming part of this new ward. I met more people this past Sunday. I'm glad I joined ward choir, they're so nice and positive. It's like instant friends. I'm kinda looking forward to this Sunday, but this past Monday's FHE, I started to become introverted again. I got seriously shy. It just came on suddenly...I hope that doesn't happen on Sunday!

-I need to read something, soon. I haven't read anything for the last 2 weeks and I feel stupid. Ok, maybe that's extreme, but after coming off of reading 3 books, back-to-back, I NEED something to read, ASAP!! What I need to do is contact my new sweet book hook up and start getting some books!!!

-Ok that's all.......Happy Thursday!

Kuku & Tutu Aikau ♥

2011-11-01T17:11:00.000-07:00

In honor of Dia de los Muertos....

Today is Dia de los Muertos. Before, I use to think it was weird because I thought it was a day to celebrate the dead. It is exactly that, but I've come to see it as more than just thinking of the dead. It's thinking of those loved ones who have passed away. I like to think of it as cherishing the life they lived and the love we have for them. Today I remember my Kuku & Tutu, my maternal grandfather & grandmother. My Kuku passed away two months before my mission (2002). He was a huge advocate of missionary work. Oft times I felt his presence with me on my mission. My Tutu passed away exactly 15 months after him (2003). I was on my mission and it was one of the most difficult experiences I had to face alone. I am grateful for my testimony of the Atonement, which stemmed from that experience.
I miss my Kuku and Tutu. They are the only grandparents I ever knew. (My paternal grandfather died long before I was born. As for my paternal grandmother, she lived in Tonga. I only spoke to her once, since she didn't know English and I didn't speak Tongan.) I am grateful for their support in helping me learn the organ and giving me my violin. I knew and felt of their love for me. I wish I had a chance to know them, as an adult... to have them meet my [future] spouse and hold my children. I look forward to the day I get to see them again. I love them with all of my heart ♥.

Stupid crazy Monday!

2011-11-01T03:13:00.000-07:00

In short, today started out CRAZY--- (more on that some other day)
And then it ended quite nicely.
I went to my new ward's Halloween party, with my friend Berkeley.

Then I had the awesome surprise of coming across an ol' friend from my old ward. I was so ecstatic to see a familiar face! It was comforting because I was suddenly shy when I showed up to the party. It was a blessing to have two familiar friends around me. Thank you Heavenly Father for answering one of my many prayers today.

Free books? YES PLEASE!!

2011-10-29T14:22:00.000-07:00

This has become my favorite spot in my house. Lately, it's become the focal point of my room. Before, my bookshelf use to just hold my books, but now it's become the center of my universe. I just love this corner because of how colorful and alive it feels. These aren't all of my books, I've got books under my bed and in a box in the trunk of my car.
I've been spending a lot of time at my secret book spot and scoring some sweet finds! Yesterday I scored the sweetest "find" possible!
Right after my mission, I worked in the office at Deseret Industries. There was a gentleman that came in about 2-3 times a day for books. He was always friendly with me. I would entertain his humor and laugh at his lil jokes. In talking with him, I came to find out that he did book reviews for Deseret Book. Once he offered me a possible book review job. I turned it down since I was soon leaving for school out of state. The funny thing about it, he wasn't Mormon. However, he had a respect for the LDS church, being Jewish.
Over the years, I'd randomly see him around town. We remembered each others' names and would exchange pleasantries with one another. Yesterday, as I was eating lunch with my best friend, he happened to approach us and soon joined our table for a few minutes. We talked about the DI, Utah and books. I expressed my rediscovered love of books & my secret book spots in town. He told me that he had somewhere much better than all those places combined--his personal collection. He said that he's been giving all my secret spots hundreds of books from his collection. He hasn't been able to do so lately because of his failing health. He gave me his card and said to put a list together of all the books I'm looking for. (He even offered for me to just come over and go through all his books...all of which I could have for free!!) I told him I was looking for a lot of the classics (Les Miserables, Anna Karenina, The Odyssey, Iliad), he said that he had them all. Also, if I happen to be looking for church books, he had those as well. Now I remember him telling me how Deseret Book use to send him books for him to read and review, so he read through them once and just kept them (or later donated them).
HELL FRIGGIN YEAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!
It was like a ginormous Christmas gift!! I AM SO FRIGGIN STOKED!!! TOTALLY HOOKED UP!!!
Oh I cannot wait!! My mind has been racing since our chance meeting!
What do I want??
Walt Whitman... Edgar Allan Poe... Leo Tolstoy....Robert Browning....Jane Austen....EVERYTHING!!
YES, PLEASE!!!

BEST friends day!!

2011-10-29T01:12:00.000-07:00

I feel like today has been "Best Friends" day! Just what I needed!

I got to text back & forth with my best friend StephyPooh. She's a busy wife & mama of 2 adorable little girls, so I cherish anytime we get to communicate. She had me laughing out loud! I treasure our friendship so much. She means the world to me and I wish wholeheartedly that we could live closer to each other. She was my favorite missionary companion. She has a heart of gold! We were texting about how crazy life is and we brought up mission memories....like the time we were caught in a rainstorm without any jackets or umbrellas. Or the time I slipped in a rain puddle and landed on my backside, in mud. Oh such fun times! The time I served with her, was my fondest time on the mission. In short, I miss her terribly.

My oldest best friend Liz, who grew up across the street from me, had the day off so she called me up. She ended up coming over and we caught up with each other. We haven't talked or hung out lately, so the time together was very welcomed . It was just wonderful having quality time with her. It felt like the good ol' days of just kickin' it together. We talked about our families, jobs, school, dating & life, in general. I didn't realize I missed her that much. It was such a delightful afternoon! I really miss living across the street from her.
Lastly, I got to hang out with my best friend Bugs tonight. We walked around Old Town and visited the shops. We looked at a lot of Dia de los Muertos stuff. It was just a relaxing evening, spent amongst the Mexican culture. As always, we had great conversations about everything. I love talking with Bugs, I never feel judged. She probably knows me the best out of everyone in my life. Even though we just spent this past Monday together, all day, we still find so much to laugh and talk about.

After some crazy events this week, I couldn't be more grateful to have spent the day with my very best friends. I LOVE the quality time I get to spend with them. They all have a very generous heart and are very giving. I always hope that I am reciprocal in my friendship with them. I am thankful to have them all in my life. I have been blessed (and spoiled) with the BESTEST best friends a girl could ever ask for!! My cup runneth over ♥♥♥

Facebook, thank you for informing me about my family.

2011-10-26T14:37:00.000-07:00

Today I'm pissed, hurt, sad and in disbelief.
My once cherished relationship with my nephew Kea is gone.
I woke up this morning to a picture of his girlfriend's left hand showing off her nail polish....and ring.
Then I scrolled down to see that she's engaged. To my nephew.

I hate this. I. HATE. IT.!!!
I always told him that if anything or anyone stood in the way of his mission, I would hate it/them.

I called him out about it on Facebook. I know, I know...that's not extremely mature. But I figured "Hey! If this is how I'm going to find out, then this is how I'm going to respond."
Then it ended up in a texting war, while I was out to Costco with my other nephew. I was shaking because I was so livid. I'm hardly ever this mad. But I wasn't just mad, I was hurt. I'm hurt that our relationship has dwindled down to nothing, because he likes to communicate with me only if he needs something.
I'm hurt that I didn't find out from him, but from a photo on his fiancee's page. I'm hurt that he didn't tell me.
And today that hurts me to my very core.

Norah Jones & Mint Tea

2011-10-25T15:47:00.000-07:00

Today's a rather good day for tea. I don't normally drink "hot drinks", but the weather has been calling for it. Mint tea coupled with some Norah Jones makes for a very lovely afternoon.

Today is my best friend's birthday....

We haven't hung out much since we moved in December. It hurts my heart because I loved having her right across the street. We were neighbors since we were born 31 years ago. It's always been fun having her so close. I surely miss her. I think I'll have to give her a call here soon, today.

I came across this today. Made me think a lot about what my sign would say if I had to wear one. I'll post my sign sometime soon.

Yesterday, I spent the day up in Los Angeles with my BFF, Bugs. We stopped by the Santa Monica pier before we hit the freeway. It was a VERY pleasant day. I love my BFF!! We're the best of friends and she knows all my secrets. We had the radio off the whole time and just talked. I love good conversations!

My Artsy friend invited me over to decorate Dia de los Muertos sugar skulls. I took my niece with me and it was really fun! I think I rather do that than carve pumpkins, for sure!!

I'm really excited for this Halloween season because I'm looking forward to more Dia de los Muertos celebrating. Can I say "celebrating"? Well, whatever the appropriate word is, I'm stoked for it. I just love all of that Mexican folk art!!

And isn't it ironic... don't you think.

2011-10-25T00:56:00.000-07:00

Well, I was late to my first Sunday at my new ward (church congregation). They moved to a new building this year and it looks NOTHING like a typical LDS chapel. I sat out in the foyer during the rest of Sacrament meeting. Afterwards, I kinda watched some Relief Society women just walk on by. It made my heart sink and then think back to my Relief Society sisters, my dear friends, and hoped they never let a newcomer just sit alone by herself. Luckily, "Sonny", a [good lookin'] Samoan friend of a friend remembered me and showed me around. Sonny's very pleasant and it was nice to have someone finally say hi. I sat by myself in Gospel Doctrine class. I thought it was pretty ironic that the scripture we discussed in class came from Ephesians:
Now therefore ye are no more strangers and foreigners, but fellow citizens with the saints, and of the household of God;
I couldn't help but chuckle to myself.... This was so totally me! The teacher asked the class if this related to anyone. One person raised their hand but their example wasn't too stellar. So I raised my hand because it totally described my feelings that day. Part of my heart was left back at my old ward and I was trying desperately to make myself feel comfortable at this new ward.

In the end, I ended up meeting more EQ guys than RS women. Some of them weren't all too friendly. The guys were nice but they weren't my ol' familiar guy friends from the ward, I meant, my old ward.

*sigh*

This experience left me thinking about my mission. It was like being transferred from a beloved area full of my favorite people to a new area of strangers that I've yet to know & love. I remember that happening when I left Medford, my first mission area. I cried on the way back to the apartment that last night. I was going to miss all those members & friends who took me in and loved me so! Once I acclimated myself to Bordentown, I missed Medford less and less and loved Bordentown more and MORE! I didn't completely forget about Medford, it would always have a special place in my heart. New friends that I made didn't replace all those magnificent friends from my first area, they were just more people for me to love and vice versa. So as much as I will love and miss CVYSA, it's time to move on and make new friends and memories.

What tomorrow brings....

2011-10-22T22:25:00.000-07:00

I'll be attending a new ward tomorrow.
I'm not gonna lie, I'm nervous and sad, but also excited and anxious. I guess I'm just a bundle of emotions. I'm sad because I won't have all my friends there. I won't be greeted with hugs and smiles as I always am when I attend church. Familiar faces will be replaced by strangers (aka: new friends yet to be made). My heart isn't exactly happy but it's trying to be. It's a new experience. I don't do so well with those sometimes. Oh well...

I just hope this won't be me, all day at church:

I hope I make a friend.

(wow, that sounds sad....but it's the truth. sigh.)

...and in the end....

2011-10-21T11:52:00.000-07:00

I did get to spend my Thursday with comfortable friends and especially one in particular. I'm really glad.

My recital went well. I was first up to bat and man, that made me more nervous. I wasn't necessarily nervous, but I wasn't completely comfortable. For those with vocal pieces, we didn't get a mic to use. Hermana R said that "real singers don't use a mic". Wow. I feel like a real singer now. My only qualm about the recital is that the very spot of the music stand must have been about 50 degrees hotter! Seriously, I haven't sweated that much since being on an elliptical! I think every pore must have been sweating! It was hotter than Hades! Afterwards I told my music teacher and she said that it's common for a performer's body temperature to go up. I just didn't expect it to go up that much. In the end, I did well and I was happy with my performance. I'm glad I had a friendly face to concentrate on and would smile back at me. It made a big difference.

I went by my church last night... Mr. Red had a meeting and I also wanted see my friends. Can I just say, I love walking and talking with Mr. Red! Seriously, it's one of my top 5 favorite things to do. I love the fresh air combined with our conversations about everything. I couldn't be more grateful to have him in my life.

Tonight I get to see my dear friend, Nash. I'm really glad and can't wait! Also because I get to see BabyChleo! Oh I love that baby SO VERY VERY VERY MUCH!!!! As excited as I am to see Nash & Hubby, my dear, close friends..... I'm actually more ecstatic to see BabyChleo! I sometimes wonder why I love that baby so much. Some may think I'm baby hungry and feel the need to have children---maybe. But what it comes down to, I knew Nash & Hubby when they were just dating. Then I was there when they were married and it was a beautiful ceremony. Nash was radiant and Hubby couldn't be anymore happier. When Nash found out she was pregnant, I was amongst the first she told. Every Sunday we would sit together in Sunday School and I would rub her belly. So in essence, I love BabyChleo so much because I loved her from the very beginning, because I love her parents. They mean so much to me. ♥

"Comfortable friends"

2011-10-20T13:30:00.000-07:00

Sometimes it's really, REALLY nice to turn your phone off for the day.

And other times, it's really, REALLY nice to have some of your "comfortable friends" around you.

Today, I really, REALLY miss CC & Hermanita. I miss them so much!!

I wish I could spend the day lounging around in pajamas watching chick flicks with CC.

I wish I were in Hermanita's car, just talking with her til 6am.

I miss them so much today.

I wish more of my "comfortable friends" lived close by.

I'm grateful for the "comfortable friends" that bless my life. Those heaven sent angels that know me to the core and I never feel the need to explain stuff because they just get it.

In the meanwhile...these occupied my time.......

Excuse me, I'm suffering from a case of 'Butterfly Knots' today.

2011-10-19T12:52:00.000-07:00

-So tomorrow's my recital. I'm nervous as heck and because I am, I can't memorize A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G!!! When my nerves get the best of me, it's just terrible!!! It's like my mind can't wrap itself around the lyrics that I know I KNOW.... I can already feel the knots in my stomach. Knots? Butterflies? Butterfly knots? Yes, that's exactly what I have. I have Butterfly Knots. That's what I'm calling them from now on.

-Have you ever been super stoked excited to see someone...and then got way too nervous that you started to think that you don't want to see them? Sorry, apparently I'm suffering from the 'crazies' as well today.

-Anywhoo... I get to walk & talk with Mr. Red tonight. Walking & talking is one my most favorite thing to do with friends. I think fresh air helps people think clearer. Plus, I always rather be outside. (And when I say "walk" I mean 'stroll', no power walking here...it'll interfere with the integrity of a good conversation)

-I finished reading Eat, Pray, Love last night and then watched the movie. Yep, the book was WAAAAAAAAAAAAY better!!! Oh I loved that book!! I need to meditate. I haven't being doing so lately. I like trying to align my chi and get my spirit in a good place.

-Sim & I went to Barnes & Noble yesterday. OH MAN, I LOVE THAT PLACE!!!! I ALWAYS want to buy EVERYTHING in there...or at least one of everything. I love the deal they have going on right now, Buy 2 get 1 free (of their B&N classic versions). I found Anna Karenina, The Art of War & Tao Te Ching. I SOOOOOOOOOOOO wanted those...but I need to finish the books I've recently purchased. Those will the next 3 books I purchase. But, I also found an awesome book by Walt Whitman that I want...which happens to be part of that special. Man, I LOVE BOOKS!! I LOVE TO READ!!! As we were walking around, I felt as giddy as a kid at Disneyland.

-Yes, books & reading have become my life. Earlier this week, I went to my secret spot for buying sweeeeet books. I TOTALLY scored on a compact quad of the scriptures (Bible & Book of Mormon). TOTAL SCORE! I love it!! I can't wait to start reading the scriptures again, from cover to cover. I'm stoked for this smaller version because, for the last 5 months I've been hauling a VERY heavy bag to church each week. Now I can just show up with a cute small purse and call it a day! :) Love it! I also bought:

I've rediscovered my love affair with reading & books and I couldn't be any happier. More on this top later...

Love + Service = Charity

2011-10-17T22:59:00.000-07:00

From my journal....
May 16, 2011 - 2AM Monday Morning
I was called into the Bishop's office yesterday. It was a very humbling experience. He extended the call of Relief Society President to me. I felt very small and humbled, as well as unworthy & inadequate. I told the Bishop that I wanted to pray about it to get my own confirmation. I can't believe it. I am grateful for this opportunity to be an instrument in the Lord's hands, to be in the service of others & to be more charitable. I hope to do my very best.
-ESL

Yesterday I was released as my ward's Relief Society president. Man, I didn't think I'd be as emotional as I was. My heart was joyful for Joz, because I know that she will be an excellent president. I know this because she's been an AMAZING first counselor. When I was released, I felt empty, like the mantle was taken off of me...much like being released as a full-time missionary for the church. To describe it, it's like a sigh of relief, but an immediate rush of sadness and longing for the right & responsibility again. After I was released, the water works wouldn't stop flowing. Seriously, it was terrible AND I was playing organ too, so I was on the stand. AYE!! I couldn't find my tissue anywhere and I tried to wipe my face on the inside of my sweater during the Sacrament prayers (gross, I know...). Luckily, my friend (and chorister) went up to bear her testimony and brought back some tissue for me. And then Fast & Testimony meeting turned into an 'Ehu Tribute' time. I was wholeheartedly touched...but I felt a lil bad for any visitors and those desiring a gospel uplift. I decided that I should bear my testimony, because my heart was so full of appreciation for the Atonement (and the tissue box by the pulpit was a lot closer than walking up the chapel aisle and to the restroom). I am thankful for the Atonement. I wouldn't have been allowed the experience of serving as the Relief Society president if I didn't fully partake of the blessings of the Atonement.
I have never put so much of my heart and soul into a calling. I loved and enjoyed this calling far more than my mission and serving as a temple ordinance worker. Don't get me wrong, I LOVED those callings too! The words of my mission call come to mind, "Greater blessings and more happiness than you have yet experienced await you as you humbly and prayerfully serve the Lord in this labor of love among His children". That doesn't just apply to a mission call, I think that applies to all callings, when those calls of service are greatly pursued.
I NEEDED this calling and didn't even know it. A week before I was called, I was driving home thinking, "I need to do more service for others. I haven't been and I feel like my heart is black." Then it happened... In fact, I was going to leave church early that day due to not feeling well that weekend, but surprisingly all signs of illness disappeared during Sacrament meeting. When the call was extended, my immediate concern that I expressed to the Bishop was, "How am I going to love ALL the sisters?". Then I remembered something I learned on my mission, "Serve them til you love them and then you'll love to serve them". It's true!! I tried it!! I LOVED serving my fellow Relief Society sisters, with all of my heart, I LOVED IT!!
It felt like the more I served and loved others, Heavenly Father quadrupled that and gave it back to me in the form of love, from so many. I have never felt so much love in my entire life than I did during these last several months. My heart could burst from all the love that so many gave me in return, or just gave me-period! The windows of heaven were surely open to me and I am grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who knows each of us. I will forever be thankful for the time I had to serve my fellow sisters. I have a greater love for each them. Several of them have become dear close friends, friendships that I will forever cherish. I hope Heavenly Father knows how grateful I am for everything, most especially this last chapter of my life. My cup runneth over.... ♥ ♥ ♥

It's not often....

2011-10-16T00:35:00.000-07:00

...but I could really use a GOOD guy hug.

*hmph*

The day before....

2011-10-15T11:32:00.000-07:00

<--- I just fell in love with The Killers even more.

I have so much on my mind. I feel like I have so much to do before tomorrow.

But tomorrow's going to be a different type of church experience. I haven't felt this feeling since the last residential block that we tracted, as a Mormon missionary. I feel like I have this anxiousness and nervousness to get so much more done before I'm released as Relief Society President. I want to go visit all the sisters that I can today! I want to set in order EVERYTHING before it's handed off to the next president. I already know who it's going to be and I have all the faith in the world in her. I know her personally and I know that she will be a far better president that I could have ever been. In all honesty, I think I rocked as president but I KNOW that she will excel far beyond my capacity. I love her dearly and I know she loves the sisters dearly, as well.

Hmmm... so I do have a lot to do today. Dang, and I get to see some of my funniest friends tonight. I'm stoked!

Recital: "R-E-C-I-T-A-L, Recital."

2011-10-14T02:06:00.000-07:00

From my journal... (excluding the real names of those mentioned)

Oct. 12, 2011 - Wednesday

Hermana (Sister) "R" informed me that she would be having a recital for her music students, and we could invite anyone we wanted to.

I only thought of 2.5 people:

-Novee, my niece.

-Mr. Red.

-(and possibly) Izzy, my friend.

*I figured Novee, because she loves me and thinks highly of me.

*Mr. Red: Well because I like seeing him. He means something to me.

*Izzy, because she likes my voice and will still love me, in the end.

When I asked Novee, she immediately asked if I was going to invite Mr. Red. I told her it crossed my mind and I did text him:

Tuesday

4:09p: Out of curiosity, will you be back by the 20th (next Thursday)?

4:18p: Yes indeed. What's up?

4:32p: I'm trying to decide if I want to tell/ask you or not....

6:40p: It's this small thing, that's kinda neat but lame. I'll just talk to you about it when you get back.

6:42p: Ok, I'll see ya when I get back ;)

So I thought I was off the hook, until he got back. Well this morning I was reading about meditation & spirituality, Mr. Red came to mind, a lot. He weighed heavy on my mind. Then about a minute later I got this:

11:22am: So any change of heart on the question?

11:23am: I mean do you still wanna wait till I get back before you ask?

11:24am: I have another question first- do you ever feel like you can call people with your mind or know/feel when someone is thinking about you?

11:25am: Yes I do. Totally happens.

11:26am: I've been reading about meditation & spirituality for the last half hour and you were on my mind....and then here you are texting.

11:28am: Hahaha see! I figured it was something like that. You popped in my head.

11:41am: So were you gonna ask me the original question or wait? ;)

Then he called me and we talked.

I asked him.

And he said yes.

Wow... I'm just tripped out about the way he felt me,

thinking about him.

-ESL.

Tuesday, once more....

2011-10-12T16:36:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was BLESSED to talk with Mama McK. I love this woman dearly. I consider her a second Mom. I've known her for years and didn't even know it. She's my friends' Mom and I met her before, but was blessed last year when she and her husband served their mission in my ward. Words cannot adequately describe the deep love and admiration I have for her. I cherish the bond we have and miss our Tuesday afternoon chats. It was so good to catch up with her because it's been a while and communication was lacking, on my part. Papa & Mama McK will always have a special place in my heart, most especially Mama McK. She's chastised me when I needed it, loved me in every moment and listened to my every word. After we hung up yesterday, my heart felt like it could burst. I felt like their was a restoration of something good and wholesome again, in my heart. I am eternally grateful to a loving and omniscient Heavenly Father who sent her to me, when I needed a warm & loving heart like hers.

Upside.

2011-10-10T02:21:00.000-07:00

3 things came to mind today....

1. To me, SUCCESS is the person that fails, but gets back up and tries again....and again...and again.

2. I like having a blog that's diverse in feelings, emotions and experiences. To paint a picture of only good things wouldn't be real.

3. I LOVE living in San Diego!

Hiroshima.

2011-10-09T03:58:00.000-07:00

It's not often when I feel like a complete failure.
Tonight happens to be one of those nights.
I can't sleep, my mind won't turn off and the water works won't stop....

Tonight, Joz & I were asked to sing at the adult session of Stake Conference. It was a song we sang about 3 weeks ago in our ward, so it wasn't something new. We practiced. I practiced. A LOT of practicing went on.
But tonight, I didn't reflect that.

My mind totally spaced on one of the words in the first verse.
and to make matters worse...
I held the last note of the song for a half second instead of 4 seconds long.

Not to mention that my mouth was unbelievably dry and I took breaths in the wrong spots. (ie: in the middle of a word! WHO FRIGGIN DOES THAT?!?!)

As I was laying in my bed, my mind kept going over and over our musical number. I have no idea what happened. Well yeah I do. I was so terribly nervous. As I looked around the chapel, I was met with faces that were unfamiliar. None of them were really friends that I had grown accustomed to, from my ward. I didn't see my dear sweet Relief Society sisters. Mr. Red wasn't there as he always is, when I sing or speak. No one looked happy or warm or very friendly...which made me even more nervous.

I've got to be up in about 3 hours, because stake choir has their last practice at 8:30am. Part of me doesn't want to sing with them. I just feel like such a failure, right now. I'm so embarrassed. I can't face my vocal teacher, who happens to be directing the choir. We worked so hard on the song and I failed miserably. I'm thankful to have Ras as my dear friend. We were texting back and forth about this right now.

I feel a lil better, but not much... I hate failing when I KNOW that I could have (& should have) done so much better. I'm my own harshest critic.

Movie...Marriage....Mmmm?

2011-10-06T12:51:00.000-07:00

”We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things, all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go unwitnessed because I will be your witness'." -Shall We Dance.

I have a lot on my mind. I have marriage weighing heavy on my thoughts. I hung out and watched a movie with Mr. Red the other night. He sent me home with a movie to watch. It was a suspenseful movie about a husband who witnesses the murder of his wife. There was a part in the movie when the husband reaches over to his wife's side of the bed. Upon noticing that it's cold, he realizes that she's been out of bed for a while. It made me think and long for that. Last night, I texted my friend FishLips and told him that I feel the most single (not married) at night and wondered if he ever felt the same. He agreed. We went back and forth on this for a while. I told him that a bed feels too big without someone, near by. Then he replied, "I just like knowing that I have a partner, a friend, someone who loves me nearby." Ain't that the truth....
As I was writing in my journal this morning, I flipped by an entry of a movie quote that I love,
"But love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. I say, fall head over heels, find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. How do you find them? Well, you forget your head and you listen to your heart... Cause the truth is there's no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love, well, you haven't lived a life at all. But you have to try, cause if you haven't tried, you haven't lived."

Oh Love.... I love you so much.

No...

2011-10-04T17:57:00.000-07:00

....I didn't watch General Conference.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've been asked if I watched General Conference this past weekend.
I chose not to watch it.
"Why?", you may ask...

I have my agency.
I usually fall asleep during Conference, which means I need to re-watch it anyways.
8 hours of sitting does a number on me. [which usually goes back to #2]
It's a lot to take in at once, which means my retention is slim.
I rather study it in the Ensign so I can retain more.
.....and because I have my agency.

It really stumps people when they ask, "Did you watch Conference?" and I respond with, "No, I didn't." They're besides themselves. Some just stare blankly. Others dismiss it and think I'm joking.

No, I wasn't joking.

No, I don't like to sit for hours on end watching it.

No, I don't care what others may think or how they may judge me.

and

No, I'm not going to hell because I chose not to watch General Conference.

Weekend Recap: B-day Party & stuff...

2011-10-03T18:34:00.000-07:00

"B-day Party"

Just some of my favorite photos from my belated birthday & farewell party given by The D's.

It was a very lovely evening and more than I could have ever ask for! It was thoughtful and kind on so many levels! I felt so loved and appreciated. I hope I have given that same gift to all those in attendance. I've been blessed beyond measure with the world's greatest friends! The appetizers were d'lish! The food & dessert were exceptional! And the company was fantastic! I LOVED it all!! And to think I was dreading this birthday. So much celebrating all month long!
My cup runneth over! ♥

"& stuff..."
Saturday night, I went out to dinner with Ras & his friend, Kobe. It was fun! We had La Bella's pizza, which was surprisingly good! I usually have their Manicotti, so it was a nice change up. We hung out in Chula Vista for a bit, then ended up cruisin' to Imperial Beach. We're currently experiencing a "Red Tide" which creates glowing waves (Bioluminescence). It was fun and so relaxing! I LOOOOOOOOVE the beach!! It was fun watching Kobe's reaction to the waves and movements of the water.
For those who've never witnessed such a phenomenon:

It's quite a sight to see!! I LOVE it! We watched it off the IB pier so it was cool to see the actions of dolphins and fishes. Any movement in the water, would have bright blue illuminating around it. There were dolphins chasing schools of fish and anytime they'd start to scatter, it would look like fireworks!!! Seriously, exactly like fireworks in the water!!! It was way AWESOME!!

Yet another reason why I LOVE living in San Diego!!

Friday night paaaaaaartay!

2011-09-30T12:35:00.001-07:00

Hmmm.....
Some dear friends are throwing me a belated birthday party tonight.
I don't know what to wear!?!
I know my hair and toenails look cute....

....now to figure out the inbetween.

But I KNOW I'll be happy, two of my favorite people will be there and that's good enough for me.

♥

............
4:08pm:
Ok, I know what I'm gonna wear! I found some cute grey ballerina flats while out shopping today and I have a deep purple top that I never wear, matched with jeans and I think I'll be good. I'm stoked cause I'll be able use my CUUUUUUTE birthday purse too!
I really want to get ready right now!
STOKED & a lil nervous......

I guess I'm nervous because I have a like/dislike relationship with being the center of attention. I mean, I know I won't be the center of attention the whole time, but it's a party for me & my birthday. I rather just shrink away in the corner talking to a close friend or holding BabyChleo that I LOVE so much. You have no idea how touched I am that someone would want to throw me a birthday party. This month has been the BEST birthday month ever!! I feel like I'm constantly getting birthday cards/greetings/gifts every other day from loved ones. I couldn't be more grateful to be surrounded by such heartfelt love. My cup runneth over.....

Thoughts on a Thursday: Friendship.

2011-09-29T16:42:00.000-07:00

For once, today doesn't feel like a Thursday. I'm kinda bummed about that. Usually, I can FEEL it. Today, not so much. I wonder why?

I've been thinking of friends and friendship.

I am sincerely grateful for family and friends who know me so well. I'm thankful for those who understand what comes out of me, when sometimes I have no explanation.

Yesterday, a new acquaintance "noticed" some things about me and my personality. It surprised me and gave me things to think about. I didn't think his assessment was completely accurate so I talked to Mr. Red about it. He reassured me that I wasn't off in thinking that assessment and my personality weren't aligned with one another. Then I started to think of my friendship with him. A couple weeks ago, we talked about how well he knows me. I said, "I think you could possibly know me the best, at church." [amongst friends who've known me for years and some, since high school] He confidently replied, "I do know you the best." Part of me was a little terrified because of his bold declaration. But it's true, he's right.
I have some reservations about trusting people and "letting them in". I don't trust easily because I hate being hurt. I'm grateful for loved ones who just get what I'm saying and sometimes, see beyond that and hear what's not being said.

After our conversation, I sent him a text:

"I'm very thankful you speak "Ehu" and that you just get me."

I don't do so well at always communicating what's on my mind or in my heart. I'm scared to get hurt. But I'm thankful that he gets me, that he listens to what I say and especially to what I don't say and in the end, tolerates my idiosyncrasies. (Heaven knows I have a lot of them!)

I'm thankful for all my friends who speak "Ehu" and when I rarely have to explain what I mean, because they know me.

What's cookin', good lookin'!?

2011-09-28T11:15:00.000-07:00

I started reading "Like Water for Chocolate" last night. I've always LOOOOOOOOVED that book! I'm 70% done with the book. Oh Tita y Pedro...

But now I just want to make everything under the sun!!

I've been craving my Peruvian bean & chicken soup. I NEED to make that. Oooh I miss it so! I feel like it cures a sad heart and cheers a good day. Yup, it's really that good.

Oh I don't know what I want to make...but I feel like I want soup. However, I miss eating soup with Mama McK's homemade bread.

In essence, I miss Mama McK. I miss her a ton. Oh my heart could use one of our wonderful Tuesday conversations in the kitchen.

But for now, I will attempt to make my soup and send good thoughts her way. I miss her so.

Did you know that today's Tuesday?

2011-09-27T18:31:00.000-07:00

S t u f f o n m y m i n d....

-I bought two books today. Thanks for the birthday money, Mom & Dad, this is what I used some of it for. I feel like these two books are complete opposites, but I'm SUPER stoked for both books! Oh I LOVE Like Water for Chocolate!! It's filled with such passion and delectable meals! LOVE IT!!

-Hung out with my niece today. Tons of fun, singing in the car to Glee, eating our Polish dogs at Costco and just chillin'.Goooooood times. I feel so blessed/spoiled that my niece WANTS to hang out with me. How lucky am I?! :)

-Can't really think of anything else right now.........

-Oh yes I can.... I CAN'T wait til Friday!! I get to see BabyChleo!
-Citizen Cope & hoodie sweaters make me happy.
-I think this is gonna be yet ANOTHER epic weekend!! Can't wait!
-I've been listenin' to a lot more classical and opera music. I forgot how much I LOVE it!! It just feels like I'm listening to REAL music, REAL singing and REAL talent. It feels like the purest form of music. Much more relaxing!
-My niece was talking to me about wanting to learn the violin. I have a violin and know how to play it.... so maybe I could give her lessons. I want her to have music talent, since it thrives in my family. I don't know where to start, since it's been 23 years since I took my first violin lessons. We'll see....

Scenes on a Sunday

2011-09-26T02:19:00.000-07:00

1. BabyChleo, Oh I LOVE that baby SOOOOOOOOO much!!! She lights up my Sundays!!

2. I'm so grateful for Mr. Red!! :)

3. My lil missionary!! I'm gonna miss this girl!

4. My niece's cool Panda hat! I LOVE pandas!

5. Tui and an adorable half Tongan/Caucasian lil boy!

I think I just caught a glimpse of my future kids ;)

I'm gonna miss this girl!!

2011-09-24T13:11:00.000-07:00

This is my friend CC.

She's been called to serve a mission for The Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter-day Saints, in Denver, Colorado. She's looked forward to her 21st birthday since...the womb. I'm so excited for her and will miss her dearly!! She's been a wonderful friend and will make a spectacular missionary!

This is my friend Dixie (no, that's not his name, it's his g-ma's name that always popped up on my caller ID...so that's what I've been calling him since.) I haven't seen him in FOR.EV.ER!!! I've missed him so much and couldn't be any happier to have him here in town this weekend!!

Temple time!

2011-09-23T15:35:00.000-07:00

I got to go to the temple today with my nephew, Sim and our friend Ras. It was wonderful. I forgot how much I enjoy and NEED the peaceful, spiritual atmosphere. It was GREATLY needed. I just needed to get away from the world and focus on the eternal nature of life and its purpose. While pondering and meditating, I couldn't help but feel a longing for the temple. I forgot how much I MISS working there on Saturdays. I missed all my friends and dear sisters that I got to know and love.

Serving at the temple was one of my favorite callings. I think I say that for every calling I have--that's what happens when you pour your love and devotion into service.

All in all, it was very wonderful being at the temple today. It reminds me of how much more I need to go, how much I need to meditate and how blessed I am to be found worthy to attend. I love the temple!

A 2am Quickie.....just how I like 'em.

2011-09-23T02:30:00.000-07:00

SO. MUCH. ON. MY. MIND.!!!

-My talk: I haven't really started it. I don't like writing down talks word for word anymore. I'm an RM, I shouldn't have to. Besides, my topic is fairly easy. I'm not nervous, but I feel a lil unprepared. The part that makes me nervous is because this is a topic that Mr. Red and I have gone back and forth on. I'm not gonna lie, I'm fascinated and intimidated by Mr. Red's intelligence. If all else, I can bear testimony of what I know to be true--that is something that no one can dispute.

-It's 2am. I need to wake up in about 5.5 hours and I still need to shower from after Volleyball.

-My hair's getting long!! :) :) :) I love it!!

-I spent the evening with Mr. Red, a couple nights ago. It was enjoyable, as always, and he made dinner--unexpected. We talked and it was lovely, most especially since he had classical & opera music playing in the background. Oh I LOVED LOVED LOVED that!! Such a splendid evening of stimulating conversation!

-Sim & I are going to the temple tomorrow (aka: 6.5 hours from now). I'm so stoked! I love spending time with Sim! He's more like my 21 year old kid brother than my nephew.

-I have a headache.

-I wish I knew how to de-clutter my room. I mean, it's clean...ok, I mean, it's on it's way to being clean. I'm 75% done, but had to leave to go do Visiting Teaching. But seriously, I'm tired of the stuff I hold on to. Sometimes I think it's so unnecessary to hold on to stuff for nostalgic reasons. I'd love to get to the point of owning just enough stuff to fit in my car, that's it! That would be AWESOME!

-I've got a busy weekend ahead of me. Temple tomorrow morning, then missionary farewell party at night, with a Mexican Independencia party afterwards til 11pm'ish. Saturday; church cleaning, funeral for a Relief Society sister's stepdad, possibly squeeze in some time at the Pacific Islander Festival and then a stake service project, dinner & general Relief Society broadcast. Sunday; my talk, more visiting teaching and stake choir practice. Oh man....hello Monday!

-I'm lovin' Les Miserables!! Oh and I'm lovin' the music as well!!! The book is just so wonderful! I love the priest!

-I can't believe the end of my Relief Society calling is right around the corner. I'm sad, but happy. Not happy that I'm leaving it, but happy to know that I did my very best!

GIDDY x a THOUSAND!!!

2011-09-21T16:01:00.000-07:00

My birthday gift from "Stein" arrived today!!! :)

I LOOOOOOOOOOOVE IT!!

I never thought I'd be that kind of girl who got giddy over a purse!

A PURSE for crying out loud!!!

...but I am!

((opening the box was fun in itself!))

She's so pretty!!! I loved her from the second I laid eyes on her!

I know the color's kinda hard to tell, but it's more like dark salmon. Oh I love it!! I've been wanting an orange purse for a while and couldn't find one that was 'me'. This one's perfect!! Thank you Stein!

Amazon!

2011-09-21T14:42:00.000-07:00

I have a love/hate relationship with Amazon! Every time I'm on there, I just wanna buy EVERYTHING!!! So for now, these are on my wish list.....

(yes, some of them are children's books, but I've never read them all the way through but always heard so much about them. I especially love the Shel Silverstein books!)