The December 29th Blog

Today my wonderful, beautiful friend StephaniePatricia entered the Missionary Training Center to start her mission to Albuquerque, New Mexico...for the next 18 months. I'm going to miss her so much. I couldn't have been blessed with a more caring and loving friend such as she, these last couple months. In the short space of a few months we became so close. I will miss her every morning and all of our "Goooooooooooood Morning/Top of da mawrnin' to ya/Good Morning Star Shine, the Earth says Hello!" text messages. I will miss our daily chats... she was wise beyond her years, funnier than most and caring with a heart of gold. I love her dearly and wish her the very best as she embarks on this most awesome adventure and experience of a life time.

Life's been good lately....very good....

I had a WONDERFUL evening with Pep tonight. He's a new friend that I've been getting to know lately. He's not typically my "type" and it's kinda refreshing, something totally new and different. I like it. I like talking with him because he has such a calming effect and always prefers that I be totally open and honest with him. I really liked how cool he was with my shaved head. He's really cute and I could possibly see myself liking him. I can't wait to see him tomorrow night. I'm actually pretty excited/giddy to see him. He's seriously so cute and has such a soft face. He makes me smile.

I love Thursdays ♥

I love my Thursdays, again!

Dear Thursday,

I've missed my love affair with you, these last several weeks. Today was a very good Thursday! :) I got to hang out with my very dear friend, PajamaPants. I've missed him so much. He's one of my closest friends, I love him so much. I look forward to any opportunity I get to spend with him. He makes me laugh and he knows me COMPLETELY. I have no secrets with him and he always tells me exactly what I NEED to hear. I couldn't have been blessed with a more caring and loving friend.

I also got to hang out with StephaniePatricia. I can't believe she leaves this weekend for her LDS mission. I'm going to miss her so much. Heavenly Father couldn't have put a better friend in my path, these last several months. I've been so blessed by her and her loving friendship.

Last but not least, I got to hang with Mr.Red, as well :). He looked so AMAZING, as always. I tried to talk to him as much as I could...but PajamaPants was there and I've missed him so much. After PajamaPants left, I was able to talk with Mr.Red a lil more. Can I just say, he's so dang beautiful. Seriously, I love looking into his eyes. He's just funny and lots of fun to be around. I always have a great time.

Tonight was a good night.....a very good night. I thought tomorrow was going to be a crazy hectic day....but I'll have a nice lil lunch break to distract me :) G'nite.

-ehu.

Grinch much?

I don't mean to be a Grinch about Christmas, but it's my least favorite holiday. I don't like the way it's so commercialized. My friend put it best today, she called it "Buy me everything I want while I stress over what you want" day. I haven't even started my Christmas shopping. I hate that I haven't and I hate that I feel so guilty for not doing so. Why can't we just give gifts of time? I know my parents would appreciate me spending more time with them...as I would appreciate spending more time with some of my other family members, as well. Oh well....

So I found out some stuff about Mr. Red. Apparently he digs a chick that ALL the other guys have been into. I knew that it was bound to happen....that in time he would jump on that 'train' as well. Luckily she doesn't like him, but it doesn't matter. I'm done. Like I said before, we'll only ever be friends.

I've been sick lately. REALLY SUCKS. My voice is totally hoarse, I feel so weak and just want to sleep all the time. SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK, I just realized that I could possibly have Mono.... Really, MONO??? UGH!!!! DAMNIT.

GRR!!!!

I hate Christmas.

The End.

If ever you're at La Bella's...order the Manicotti!

So I met up with my friend Steph @ Institute cause we wanted to hang out this afternoon. What ended up happening is she made me the dearest Christmas card while I was off playing the piano. LOOOOOOOVE the card! She's truly the best!! I couldn't have asked for a better friend these past several months!! I ended up spending the late afternoon talking with Sister McKenzie. I seriously love her! She's so wonderful! I wish I had the same kind of relationship with my Mom. I love talking with Sister McKenzie. She sees the good in people and recognizes their potential. She's funny as heck, loving towards all and brutally honest. It will truly break my heart when her and Elder McKenzie end their mission next July.

Had dinner with my sister and our dear friend Rami, who's in town from Utah. Oh, I've missed her so and didn't even realize it!! It was definitely a wonderful evening!! Good food at La Bella's...love their Manicotti! I love the coziness of La Bella's. I've always imagined a first date there...there's something warm and welcoming about it.

This weekend I'll be seeing Mamacita and Mr.NY. I haven't seen Mamacita for a while. I miss working with her! She was one of the best co-workers/assistants! I miss her so much! And Mr.NY.... Hmm... I wonder how it'll be to see him again. The last time I talked to him was my last day with my old company. I had tears in my eyes and I loved his 'good-bye' hug. If I didn't have Mr.Red in my life these days, I'd probably just get weak at the knees for Mr.NY. Oh geez, I just remembered Lee will be there as well. Hmm...let's hope he's too drunk on Saturday night to remember last February :) That would be a relief!

Ok, so that's about it....G'nite.

Facelift.

I need to revamp my blog.

It feels boring.

And I want to name it something else...I'm tired of the name.

AYUDAME, POR FAVOR!! (Help me, please!!)

Homemade Soup & Bread

Got to hang out with my friends CC & Steph today. I always have the best times with them! They're chill and funny...that's enough for me. Sometimes, I get into a funk and they are the only two friends I want to interact with at church. They get me and I don't have to explain my moods, jokes or sarcasm. I don't know what I'd do without them around. Today we ate some of Sister McKenzie's homemade soup and bread. SO. DAMN. DELICIOUS.!!!! God bless this woman for everything she makes!! Afterwards, we hung out on the couches at Institute. It was cool because we were just hanging out, resting our full tummies, not really talking much....til this guy Wil walked up and started running his mouth.

I cannot stand this guy. Seriously, he needs to watch himself around me, because I don't have any more patience or a filter on my mouth. I'm done being nice, especially after last night. Last night, he started to call out CC on something he didn't like about her. Last time I checked, you don't do that to someone in front of a large group of people. You pull them aside and speak with them privately. He's extremely socially incompetent!!!

Mr. Red called me out of the blue, last night. VERY INTERESTING conversation. I love his intelligence, it's very intriguing. We texted for a while today. This man is definitely "something else". Everytime I start to think I know him, he surprises me with something new. I like it...it keeps me on my toes. I definitely like how this friendship is turning out. :)

Hmmm....and that's all I have on my mind. G'nite.

NOT another Manic Monday!! :]

*Had the BEST weekend!!! Seriously, AWESOME!!! LOVED. EVERY. MOMENT.!! The Christmas Concert for our stake was terrific!! So much fun and all of our hard work paid off!! Wow! So glad!

*Hung out with CC & Steph all weekend....FABULOUS!!

*Got to see Mr.Red all weekend, as well......LOOOOOVED IT!! Cuddled & talked.....pretty amazing weekend, if you ask me ;) Perma grin status, for sure!

*The weather was BEAUTIFUL all weekend!! Almost perfect beach weather...and it's winter!!! HAHAHAHA!! I love it!!

*I'm so giddy happy!! It's been a while since I've been 'smile all day' happy!! I can't smiling. I'm glad the storm clouds have passed and the sun is shining again....it's about time :)

*I feel so blessed with such genuine and easy going friends. The last couple of weeks has been CRAZY/HELL and it's nice to know that I have friends that make the load of life a lot easier. My cup runneth over.....

*I seriously can't stop smiling over the AWESOME weekend I had. And this Monday ain't too shabby either! It started off quite nicely with a lovely lil text message! :) And the best part is, it's just gonna get better!! I. Can't. Wait.!! Plus this weekend is my ol' company's work party...I'm stoked to see all of my ol' friends there!! Awww Mr. NY will be there ....WOW!

*I love the Mckenzies! They run the Institute of Religion for my congregation. They're from Idaho and I LOVE EVERYTHING this woman makes!! After I take a bite of anything she makes, I always think, "God bless Sister McKenzie!!". It's like manna from Heaven!! Plus, they're just the sweetest and kindest couple alive. Elder Mckenzie has an infectious smile! I can't help but smile so big everytime I see him! I just wanna hug and squeeze the stuffing out of them both! It's like seeing Santa Claus all the time! Ahhh, I just love them so much!!

*I'm actually a lil excited to play the organ at church next Sunday. It's been a while and it's been so enjoyable getting to sing the hymns at church. I'm a lil nervous, but I know I can do it!

*I've been studying the Bible more. I hate being ignorant about certain stuff. A friend teaches Sunday school at church and I'm tired of hearing stories from the Bible that I SHOULD know. It's pathetic. But I love the class because he makes the Bible come alive and it's so fascinating with all of it's stories.

*Ok, I'm seriously so happy, it's ridiculous! Happy Monday everyone!!

Such a perfect lil song ♥

Last night my sister and I watched, "The Back Up Plan" (TOTALLY CUTE! LOVED IT!)

Came across this song during the movie....loved the lyrics! It seemed to hit home... ♥ It's exactly how I feel right now. Enjoy!:

Boy you put me on the spot I don't know what to say
But I'm trying anyway
Like my hearts gonna drop
My mind drifts away and I can't control the pains

Words are spinning in my head
Don't know why I'm holding back
I should just tell you how I'm feeling yeah heh

But I don't wanna act a fool
Don't wanna look confused
If I let you know about the way I feel
Don't know what you gonna do
So I keep it locked inside
And imagine you were mine
And I'm feeling you so close but yet so far
You hold the key to my heart

The more I brush it off
Tell myself it's nothing at all
Deeper I fall
And I imagine everyday
A thousand different ways
How you respond to what I say

Am I getting lost in my dreams?
Are you unreachable to me?
Cause these butterflies just won't go away

I don't wanna act a fool
Don't wanna look confused
If I let you know about the way I feel
Don't know what you gonna do
So I keep it locked inside
And imagine you were mine
And I'm feeling you so close but yet so far
You hold the key to my heart

But if I never tell you then you'll never know
And the secret is get-ting heavy to hold
This is more than just a crush
So I may stut-ter when I speak
And my knees may get a little weak
But I've got nothing to lose and only you to gain
Tell me do you feel the same

But I don't wanna act a fool
Don't wanna look confused
If I let you know about the way I feel
Don't know what you gonna do
So I keep it locked inside
And imagine you were mine
And I'm feeling you so close but yet so far
You hold the key to my heart

-Jessica Jarrell, "Key to my Heart".

FRRRRIDAY!!!

**5 FAAAAAAAAAAAVES!!**

*Dreyer's Peppermint Ice Cream.

*Talking with Mr. Red. :)

*Having a working oven again....YUMMY YUM YUM Enchiladas!

*Being blessed with such loving & genuine friends.

*Sleep.

A lil Thursday sunshine :)

Today didn't start out as I would have liked it. That's the second week in a row now. But I'm really glad that there was a silver lining to my 'dark' cloud of a day.

I got to hang out with some of my dearest friends, play the piano that I've missed lately and I even got to talk with Mr. Red...

But I think I was a bit awkward & idiotic around him. He came over to talk to me because he was wondering where I was. We talked for a while and then it was just silent....as he continued to stand in front of me. It wasn't an awkward silence, but I just didn't feel comfortable not saying anything while he stood in front of me. I don't know why it was so weird for me tonight? We talk and text, so why was this so different to me. I guess it's because I haven't seen him for about 2 weeks...and I was just happy to see him again in real life. I don't want to like him. I mean, I do...but I can't. I like being his friend. I'm not ready for my heart to go thru hurt and sadness again. I hate that feeling, being vulnerable and hopeful all at once. I love talking with him and being able to always be open and brutally honest with him. Am I developing a 'crush' on him??? Ugh, I think I am. I feel myself getting shy and quiet around him. I can't like him...Besides, today I found something very fitting for my life:

"I can't love, shot full of holes

Don't feel nothing, I just feel cold

Don't feel nothing, just old scars

Toughening up around my heart." -Elton John

It's safer if I don't like him, or anyone else. I'm not ready to have my heart stomped on. I'm tired of my poor heart going through the ringer. Besides, Mr. Red and I are friends...we'll only ever be friends.

What I keep telling myself today...

"God, grant me the serenity

To accept the things I cannot change;

Courage to change the things I can;

And wisdom to know the difference...." -Serenity Prayer

"Imagine all the people, living life in peace..." -John Lennon.

"Nothing can bring you peace but yourself."

Monday Monday....

*Finally started "The 30 Day Blog Challenge"...from almost 2 months ago.

*I can't stand unpacking...but it is a lot better than packing. Hands down!

*My bed's now lopsided. I don't know what happened during the move, but it definitely tilts to one side now. :( GRRRR.... I miss my once perfect bed....stupid moving!

*I love Sister McKenzie (one of my Institute teachers). EVERYTHING she makes is like manna from Heaven! No joke!! Every time I take a bite of something she's made I can't help but think, "God bless Sister McKenzie". She would definitely put Martha Stewart to shame!!! I hope I grow up cooking and baking just like Sis. McKenzie!

*I ate at Tacos El Gordo twice in one day. Once at 12am and then tonight around 9pm. Yeah, I can just feel my clothes getting tighter.

*And apparently it's Christmas... I still kinda hate the holiday, aside from the Christ part. I hate the commercialization of it. It sucks all of the Christ part out of Christmas.

*This Saturday is the Stake Christmas Concert. I'm so excited to finally be singing in one. Last year, I couldn't because my Meniere's was at it's worst. I'm nervous because I'm not 100% comfortable with ALL the songs, but I'll do my very best! Handel's "For Unto a Child is Born" is pretty tricky. The running part is definitely something else.... if I can just ace it, then I'll feel fine. Good luck to me. Other than that, I just hope I don't trip during the processional and don't sing during the wrong parts. We'll see.....

Location, Location, Location...

This morning I woke up for the last time in my childhood home. I'm not really sad or bummed. I don't even know what I feel about it. It feels weird and sad. I wish I could avoid coming back to this neighborhood, but my best friend still lives across the street. It'll be weird to come visit her and see people going into my house... I guess, their house.

I'm not really excited about the move or even really bummed about it. I don't know how to describe what I'm feeling. It just feels like a new adventure.

This past June when I went up to Utah, I swung by my FAVORITE restaurant, The Pie Pizzeria. It was nice and the pizza was delicious, as usual. However it just wasn't the same. I've come to learn since then that it's the people that make a place better, not so much the location. I guess that's why I didn't go back to visit my mission {The New Jersey Cherry Hill Mission} while I was in Philadelphia because all of my friends weren't there. It wouldn't have been the same. I guess that's how I feel about moving away from my childhood home.....a family makes a house a home.

And I forgot it was Thursday...

*Woke up this morning, at 4:30am to screaming and yelling... NOT. THE. BEST. WAY. TO. EVER. WAKE. UP. Hurtful things were said, but thankfully I know they're not true and I know who I am. But seriously, I never want to start my morning like that again....

*I thought for sure that I would end this day with a trip to the ER. I'm just so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who watches over us.

*Today's been such a roller coaster type of day. I'm so thankful for the blessing of close family members & genuine friends. My cup runneth over.

*I text Mr.Red for a bit today. He makes me smile and I couldn't be more grateful to have him in my life.

*I'm so excited for my friend StephaniePatricia. She's going through the San Diego temple for the first time tomorrow. I would give anything to be there with her. Soon enough we'll get to go together. I can't wait for that day. I miss the temple tremendously.

*Life ain't so bad sometimes. That's why there's Hope. ♥

The Story of Mr. Wrong Number.

What happened with Mr. Wrong Number?

Well, his name was Hans. We ended up talking and texting every day while I was in Philadelphia. He made me laugh and even blush several times. I loved his morning phone calls, he had such a sexy morning voice. (Maybe that's weird, whatevers. I think guys sound ridiculously hot when they're sleepy or just waking up. Maybe I have a thing for 'groggy voices'?) While talking with him I found out that he was raised in the LDS religion, like me. I was SHOCKED!!! What in the world could the odds be?!?! I nearly fell off the bed, I couldn't believe it!!! [Not to worry, I tested him a bit on LDS beliefs just to make sure.] We talked about what we like to do in our free time and he wanted to go camping with me, in his RV with his 4-wheelers. Seemed like it could be fun, but also a lil 'much' for still being strangers. So we agreed that we'd just go out for dinner once I got back from Philly.

However, most of the time he kept asking me for full body pictures, just so he could get an 'idea' of what I looked like. I didn't hide anything about my physical appearance and in fact, the photo I traded him during our first phone call was one from the hip up. I didn't feel comfortable sending him "the photos" he requested. I tried to dodge that bullet several times and was successful for a while.... (NO! I did NOT send him scandalous photos)

In the end, he wanted a sexual relationship, which isn't something I was going for. As nice and funny as he was....it was short lived.

And that, boys and girls, is the story of Mr. Wrong Number.

The End.

((I wish something could have come out of this chance meeting. I think it would have made for the BEST hook up story EVER!! SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FRIGGIN RANDOM!!!!! And the odds of him being Mormon on top of that---TOO CRAZY FOR WORDS!! At times I thought it was too random to be true...but I've got his number in my phone to say otherwise. It was fun while it lasted :] ))

Maui ♥

Dear Kihei, Maui,

I MISS YOU!!!! It's been a couple years since I last saw you and it's not intentional, at all!! I miss you so much!! I'm so cold and would LOVE LOVE LOVE to be laying on a beach, especially on Kamaole beach...my fave. Life is so crazy/hectic right now and soon it'll be beyond stressful. No bueno. :( Oh what I would give to be laying on the warm sand and swimming in your delightful ocean....

Kihei, I miss you!

Love & Aloha,

-ehu

I {heart} my head!

I'm seriously loving NOT having hair!!

I didn't think I was going to embrace it this much, but I LOVE it!!! I'm not going to lie, I do miss my long curly hair at times...but it's just hair! It'll grow back!

Since I cut my hair, I now wear a lot more mascara and blush. I'm not too keen on wearing make-up everyday, but it is a nice change up to being a lil more girly on a daily basis. I'm just TOTALLY grateful that I have a nicely shaped head!!

The thing I LOOOOOOOOOOOVE the most about not having hair is not having to worry about how to do my hair. If anything, I wonder what scarf or hat I'll be wearing. (I don't mind going without a hat/beanie, but I've been a lot colder since I shaved my head...and the weather doesn't help either.)

I am very thankful for such supportive friends who have reassured me that this was a very good choice....it's been a blessing.

For Love....

Why I shaved my head tonight:

(from a previous blog post:)

"A couple months ago, my Bishop's wife was diagnosed with Breast Cancer. I don't know her too well, but I've known her as a Young Women's leader when I was a teenager and more recently as the Stake Choir director. We've been doing lil things in the ward to show our love and compassion for her. Next Sunday, the women of the ward were going to wear scarves on their heads. Very thoughtful.

For the last several weeks, I've been thinking of shaving my head because I knew in due time she would be losing her hair. Her friends gave her a 'Hats Off' party in which they gave her hats and scarves, right before she cut her hair.

I know I don't know her personally, but I hope by my shaving my head, she would know of the love and support I have for her and her battle against Breast Cancer. Not just for her, but also for another friend's wife and all women (and men) who are currently in this battle for their lives. My heart goes out to them...."

♥♥♥♥♥

Tonight, a group of friends from the ward got together to shave our heads:

I'm really grateful for this group of friends who were so willing to show their support by shaving their heads along with me. I hope our dear friend, Sister L. will know that we all love her dearly. She means a lot to us.

Shave Me!

I've been thinking of shaving my head lately. It's been about 10 years since I cut my hair SUPER short (pixie short). The last time I did that was because I was feeling random and had a pair of scissors near by. Also, it was because of spite.... I got tired of so many friends touching my long curly hair saying, "Don't EVER cut your hair!!!! It's SOOOOO beautiful...blah blah blah". So I cut it short. I remember not liking it ALL too much, but it was a nice change.

This time it's for a different reason...

A couple months ago, my Bishop's wife was diagnosed with Breast Cancer. I don't know her too well, but I've known her as a Young Women's leader when I was a teenager and more recently as the Stake Choir director. We've been doing lil things in the ward to show our love and compassion for her. Next Sunday, the women of the ward were going to wear scarves on their heads. Very thoughtful.

For the last several weeks, I've been thinking of shaving my head because I knew in due time she would be losing her hair. Her friends gave her a 'Hats Off' party in which they gave her hats and scarves, right before she shaved her head.

I know I don't know her personally, but I hope by my shaving my head, she would know of the love and support I have for her and her battle against Breast Cancer. Not just for her, but also for another friend's wife and all women (and men) who are currently in this battle for their lives. My heart goes out to them....

***update: So after I posted, I grabbed a pair of scissors and headed for the bathroom. My hair was curly with product in it, but I just wanted to see what a few inches would look like. Then I really started going to town...til I realized it would be better if I showered and had clean hair to cut. This is the final result....[til Monday when a few of my friends and I have our 'shave shindig'.]. Sad thing is...I'm really liking this new length and style! :( Oh well...keep your eyes on the prize, Ehu.

Photo Friday!

I love my friends.

I'm blessed with the best.

♥

YO ADRIAN!!

I LOOOOVED Philadelphia! Seriously, I had an amazingly awesome time!! I LOVED it there!!! I only made it to Costco in Mt.Laurel, New Jersey, but I'm okay with that. There's so much to see and do in Philly. I'd like to think of it as an east coast version of San Diego. I would LOVE to go back there again, someday. I had an awesome time with some pretty terrific people! I LOVED IT!!

I LOOOOOVED READING TERMINAL MARKET!!! Seriously, some very very good eats!! I love Carmen's Cheesesteaks the best!!!

Other than that, I'd highly recommend Philadelphia! The people are great, the food is delicious and the weather was just perfect! LOVED LOVED LOVED IT!!!

Philly, I LOVE YOU!!

This was the scenery out of our 30th floor suite.

I LOOOOOOVED it!

& now...

I MISSSSSSSSS it!!

The Unsent Letter.

I wish I knew how to share the thoughts I have in my mind and the feelings I have in my heart. To simply put it, I miss you. I miss you terribly. Just talking to you last night reminded me of something familiar. Your voice, your words, the sounds of your breath...it was like a warm safe blanket that I had longed for and didn't even know.

I miss you and I wish I could tell you. I stop myself because I doubt it really matters. I want you in my life and I feel that void every day. Oh, how I wish you felt it too. Would it really matter if I told you? Would it really make a difference? What would I tell you, if given the chance? I'd tell you that I long for you, that I miss you like no one has ever missed another person. I was never scared or timid to speak my mind with you....until now. Because, more than ever, I want to say.... I miss you. Even if you were standing right next to me, a part of me would still be long for you and missing you.

I miss you.

It's 12:46am

I should be sleeping.

I can't sleep.

I packed way too fast and now I'm second guessing myself. Did I REALLY pack EVERYTHING I need??? It's almost too good to be true!

I have so much on my mind. I really do wish my sister and I had the same flight out....that would have really put me at ease. I HATE take off and MOST ESPECIALLY, turbulence.

I can't sleep because I'm so happy, yet so sad to visit my mission. It won't be the same... I would have wished to have gone back with an ol' companion. Two of the most beloved members I have ever met, have both passed away. I always wanted to go back to see them, they meant a lot to me. They were like my adopted mothers. My heart is heavy and my mind is flooded with "coulda, shoulda, woulda" thoughts. It will be nice to go visit New Jersey....but it just won't be the same.

I should really get some sleep. It'll be no fun eating an authentic Philly Cheesesteak if I'm half asleep. :)

Why it pays to be nice to 'wrong number' phone calls....

So today, I had the most interesting phone call.

A 'wrong number' phone call....but very interesting, to say the least.

I was packing my suitcase and my phone started to ring. I didn't recognize the number, but it was a local number so I thought I'd answer it. I hardly ever answer numbers I don't recognize, but figured, 'what did I have to lose?'.

Me: Hellooo?

Him: Hey! What are you doing??

(Thoughts crossed my mind as to who it could be....Doc? Camp? Bubba?? The person on the other end of the phone sounded really nice, as though he knew me.)

Me: [in my most pleasant voice] I think you have the wrong number.

Him: Is this not Michelle?

Me: Nope, sorry.

Him: Haha, oh ok. Sorry about that.

Me: No worries, hope you find her. Bye.

Him: See ya later.

Then I started to think, "Damn, why didn't I just answer his question and go with it, ya know??" He sounded very nice, pleasant and I really wish I stayed talking to this stranger and most welcome distraction.

Next thing I know, I receive a text: "Wow, sexy voice....lol".

WOW, really....from a 16 second phone call?? Hmm, ok...well, it is a compliment after all. I was really flattered, I mean, it was ALL totally unexpected.

So I responded: "I almost wish I kept talking to you. You did sound pretty nice. Gotta say that's the first 'wrong number' where I really didn't mind. Call anytime :) "

AND HE DID!! We talked for about 15 minutes. We traded pictures and he seems like a fun and nice guy. He did make me laugh, so that's a definite plus. He said that his sister gave him 'my' number to call her daughter (his niece). He was a lil confused when the woman on the other end of the phone sounded older and more mature than his niece. We talked about our relationship status, where we live, our jobs and what we're looking for in life (He's divorced and just working a lot, always looking to make new friends, especially those of the opposite sex). I told him, "By the way, just to answer your question from your previous phone call, I'm currently packing for my trip to Philly". He thought that was funny and then sounded a lil disappointed that I wouldn't be back for a week & a half.....

...because he asked me out.

We're just going to Starbucks, so it's not a big deal...but it is pretty random, right?

Wow, gotta say..... I didn't expect my Thursday to turn out like this--95% packed & I scored a date when I get back from Philly.

GO EHU!! :)

Because it's Thursday....

...and this photo makes me laugh & smile:

It makes me laugh because of the way Mr. Red's standing and the fact that I look like such a tool!! (It was the Halloween party at church, a couple nights ago.)

I can't help but smile for so many reasons... {but here's 5 of them}:

1. He looks so ridiculously cute! From the hat to the shiny shoes...I just want to hug him and squeeze him!! [and did because he smells DELICIOUS!!] And honestly, his body looks smokin' hot in it.

2. I asked him to wear this weeks ago and he adamantly fought against it! I just wanted to see him in it. By the grace of God, he finally gave in :) And he wore it...just for me, because he took it off right after and changed into a toga for the party.

3. I love the way he's standing! I have NO idea why he's standing like that...but I seriously laugh every time I notice that!

4. He looks like the Cracker Jack boy--SO adorable!!

5. He had to pee sooooooo badly and he waited til I got there [a half hour late] just so I could see him in it and take photos. Notice the non-zipper fly pants...13 buttons between him and the restroom. I felt TERRIBLE that I was extremely late, but he wasn't annoyed and didn't make me feel bad, at all.

It was a great evening and a very fun night!

Happy Thursday!

Things I should be doing: Packing.

I hate packing.

I'm not the best packer in the world.

I just want to take EVERYTHING I own with me....but I can't.

I like options, or at least the option of a washing machine in case I want to wear something again.

Ugh.....

I hate packing.

Things I remembered this weekend:

-I like to cuddle, seriously, I'm a cuddle whore. I need to touch people and long to be touched. [Don't take that the wrong way.... Eh, take that in whatever way you want, I don't care.]

-I love Camp. Seriously, he always makes a bad day better and a good day great!! He gave me the best compliment yesterday and I will treasure that for a while. And I LOVE LOVE LOVE the way he smells so delicious. I especially LOVE it when he pulls me into his chest during our hugs/vertical cuddle time. I can't wait to see him tonight!!

-I love surfers. Seriously, they're HOT!!

-Kissing's fun...but only if you're kissing someone you have feelings for {and vice versa}. Otherwise, it's pretty much pointless.

-I have the best friends, EVER!

Void.

It's Saturday night....and I have several things on my mind.

Yesterday, I was both happy and sad, at the same time. Odd. I've never quite been like that before. I was happy for little surprises that have come into my life recently. But I was also sad because of certain voids that have occurred in my life recently.

I don't like that feeling. I rather be one or the other...but not both, at the same time. It's like they cancel out each other.

Sometimes, I wonder why I do certain things....

Why do I allow some people into my life?

Why do I trust them?

Why do I allow certain individuals to see a side of me that I would rather keep safe guarded?

Why do I love so deeply?

In the last couple of weeks, I became close to someone. I trusted him so quickly and showed him a part of me that I don't even let close friends see. As scary as it should have been, it wasn't. I allowed myself to feel vulnerable with him and I didn't think twice about it. I loved talking with him because I could freely speak my mind and didn't worry that he would think me to be insensitive, blunt, ridiculous or anything else along those lines. I didn't feel embarrassed about certain things that I should have....it was nice. It was all very comforting.

I miss that. I miss him. Sometimes, life turns out that way.

The 30 day blog challenge:

I'm stoked for this to start tomorrow!

Last night.

I had fun.

I ate Creme Brule gelato.

Ran in the rain with a friend.

And laughed, a lot.

Gratitude.

In the last week or so, I've become a lot closer with two friends. They'll never know how much they've done for me just by being my friend, listening to me and making me laugh. I may have sounded like a broken record most of the time, but the fact that they stayed by and listened or responded to my texts really means a lot to me. They came in and hugged me when I felt cold and lonely. I hope I can do for others what they've done for me in the last week.

Thank you Ceecee & Stephanie, I love you two dearly.

Thank you Heavenly Father for blessing me with such caring angels disguised as friends.

♥♥

Done.

Today, I feel like this song.

I'm done.

I'm done hoping, wishing, wanting to fall in love, liking guys.... I'm just done.

I hate the fact that I opened up and allowed myself to be so extremely vulnerable.

I wish I could take ALL of it back and that it NEVER happened.

Never again....I'm done.

A letter to myself...cause sometimes it's needed.

Dear Ehu,

Well you've had a rough couple of days this week. No bueno :( . But you've been so blessed with a loving sister and caring friends to help you through it. No one likes getting rejected, of course not. But is he really worth your tears and your heartache? Maybe? Maybe not? It was fun though, right? ;)

Now you've got a terrific opportunity of change. Change is good!! It'll be a great thing! New people, new adventures..."New" is the new black! Just think of all the new people you'll meet, the new friends you'll make and maybe even the new guys you can check out. Sweet, right?! I think so!!

Yes, you'll miss your friends but you know that this short separation will only strengthen those friendships, as it's done in the past.

So chin up! Make the most of this change and enjoy every second of it. Let's "make tracks, don't look back". Get out there!! Start living life again! We've only got one chance at this thing called "Life"....don't let another second pass you by! You're Ehu for crying out loud!! The awesome, funny, smart, spiritual and sarcastic woman everyone loves to be around!! What happened to her?? We miss her and WANT to see her soon!

This will be a very good thing, I promise!

Love,

Me.