T-minus TWO WEEKS!

Man, I'm so tired.  The last week and a half has been quite emotional which always takes a toll on my Meniere's Disease.  I hate it.  I hate when stress enters my life.  I'm glad that some people in my life understand what stress does to my Meniere's.
I had a pretty mean migraine on Wednesday.  I had my two computer screens switched out for larger ones and they happened to be extremely bright.  I didn't quite realize it was that bright until I had Chuy take a look at it.  I just figured that's how the screens always were.  Ugh.  Awful night.  Stupid extra strength Tylenol did nothing for me.  I got up at 4am, took an Aleve and started to feel better instantly!  I've had a small lingering headache for the last couple days, which only makes sense since my period started. Now I just want to sleep and lounge around all weekend.  I'm so physically tired, yet there's so much to do.
I can't believe that our wedding weekend will be here in TWO WEEKS!! 15 days from now, I'll be married!!! Part of me feels overwhelmed, but yet I just can't wait.  I'm excited, anxious, stoked, thrilled and everything good under the sun.  I get to marry the man who makes my life a million times more happier, lovelier, richer and funnier.  Every day, he gives me a reason to love him 10x more than the day before.  Today he knows that it's been a doozy for me and he got us pizza for lunch. Pizza, my most favorite meal on earth! To thank him for it, I stopped by 7-11 before he got home w/ the pizza.
He's just so good to me.  I never dreamt that I'd get this lucky.  I love him more than I've ever loved anyone in my life.  Thank you Heavenly Father for blessing me so abundantly.

Something I need you to understand....

Today I had a terrible Meniere's episode.  My head just started to spinning and I couldn't do to anything divert it.   Most times I feel like I can stop it or at least counteract it.  However, today at work, my head just wouldn't stop spinning, and it felt like the whole room was spinning.  It often feels like an earthquake, so I'll look to see someone's reaction {or lack of} and then I know that it wasn't an earthquake but just my Meniere's, again. 

Today, my head just wouldn't quit spinning, so I tried to walk 5 feet to my sister's desk and the room still felt like a Twirl-a-World ride.  Unfortunately, the catch-22 to having these Meniere's/Vertigo episodes, is that they're so stressful and make me very anxious---which stress makes Meniere's even worse.  Oh I hate that part of this disease!  I told my sister to just take me outside, so at least I could escape to a different environment and breathe some fresh air. My heart was racing, my hands were shaking and I could feel a cool sweat start on my temples. I'm thankful I was with my sister.  She's been through these episodes before, with me, so I am incredibly grateful for her patient and calm presence.  My nephews and several close friends have also been extremely understanding.  They know that when I slip my arm into theirs, that my head's in a tailspin and I desperately need them for balance or from collapsing.  Unfortunately, my parents still haven't been able to truly understand that this isn't just an earache. There's nothing painful about it.  

When I initially spoke with my audiologist, he said that this was a condition that normally falls upon older people or those who had some sort of head trauma--both of which, I am not.  I don't know how I lucked out, but I've had it for the past 4 years. Sadly, there's also no cure for this disease {I really don't like that word--it makes it sound contagious}.  Meniere's Disease is like a combination of Vertigo and Tinnitus.  However, my Tinnitus consists of a "roaring"/"whooshing" noise, as if I have a stethoscope in my left ear. Sometimes the noise gets so terribly loud, that the only way I can help the noise subside is by pushing into the side of my neck. It looks like I'm taking my pulse, but it's the only way I can stop this constant roaring noise. Other detrimental factors to this condition is stress {good and bad stress, I didn't know there was such a thing as "good stress"}, sodium, alcohol and nicotine.  Luckily, it's only the first two that I really have to worry about.  

I just wish more of my friends could understand why I suddenly get so dizzy and a cold sweat immediately begins.  Or how nauseous I get when I watch a fast moving or spiraling scene of a movie.  You know that feeling you've been bending down low, then stand up too quickly, and you're light headed?  I get that ALL the time but for long periods of time. I can usually brace myself, but if I'm not careful I collapse to the floor.  Sometimes after a dizzy spell, it wipes me out and I'm left feeling very weak.  

I worry that my Meniere's could get worse.  I use to work at the temple with a woman who also had it, and she had to have her license suspended for a bit because her Meniere's got so out of control, but then it went away for several years. 

I've learned quite a bit from having Meniere's Disease.  I've learned to avoid and handle stress better.  That's been the biggest blessing, most of all.  When I think of all the things I could endure in this world, I think I'd much rather have Meniere's Disease.  When it's at its worse, I like to think that perhaps Heavenly Father knew that this would be the best trial for my life and knew that I would be able to endure it.  That gives me hope for the future.

V Sesh

I haven't been able to sleep well, for the last few nights.  My upstairs neighbors have been SO. EFFIN. EXTREMELY. LOUD. til the early morning hours.  Unfortunately I can hear EVERYTHING because they not only make noise inside their apartment, their foul mouthed loud fights drag outside to the back parking lot and everywhere in between [aka: all the surrounding windows of my apartment].  I almost called the cops twice because it's just a damn nuisance!!!  Plus I'm so tired of hearing those chicks have loud & VERY vigorous sex.  Last night/this morning, I heard them going at it 3 times!
I'm just in terrible mood, today.  I'm so dog tired.  My Meniere's is back with a vengeance and it's kickin' my ass--hardcore.   My hearing in my left ear is shot, unless I hold a part of my neck to make the "whooshing" noise subside.   All I want to do is sleep...some good, deep, uninterrupted SLEEP.

Damn, I seriously loathe my neighbors. 

Leavin' on a jet plane....

Tomorrow, I fly to Seattle.  I'm somewhat packed--just trying to go through it and lighten my suitcase.  
I'm getting nervous and antsy.  But more nervous than antsy. 
My Meniere's has been kicking my trash lately, so I REALLY REALLY hope that Dramamine does its job tomorrow!
I'm trying to remind myself how much I love to fly, once I'm in the air.  I'm not the biggest fan of take-off, but once we're stable in the sky, I'm ok.  I didn't enjoy flying for such a long time, but I'm grateful that I was finally able to enjoy it, when I had to fly home from my mission, ALONE. 

I've got all that I need....
Dramamine.
Red Vines.
Gum.
2 magazines.
"Friday Night Knitting Club" book.
My journal.
My iPod.
and my fave....
Cranberry juice!

I like to only ever drink Cranberry juice, when I'm flying.  It's my favorite juice, so it's like a sweet treat I get to enjoy and calm my nerves, while I'm flying. 

AHHHHHH.... man, I'm nervous!  I'm sure that once I'm on the plane, I'll be ok.  Ugh... stupid take off.

Seattle, here I come....

As of late, in late August....

*Once upon a time, I thought I'd join a summer softball league because Sonny threw it out there on FB.  I quickly learned that it wasn't anything like I expected, and at times I seriously wanted to quit....and even tried.  Sonny was pretty positive and encouraged me to always do my best, since he thought I already was.  I never like quitting things, so I'm thankful for his reassurance.  I'm actually gonna miss my team, such fun & funny people! 

*I've been spending a lot more time with Mr. Red lately.  Man, I couldn't be more blessed to have him in my life.  Since my best friend has been in MIA, it's been nice having confidant I can share everything with.  We've been talking about how to better handle stress, since I tend to fail at it.  I know I need to be better at taking a step back, taking a deep breath, and analyze why I'm mad/stressed and what I'm going to do to deal with it.  We talked about a lot of different things and it was good to just clear my mind.  I've been so mentally exhausted, this past week.  It's been good to release all of that tension and learn to still release all of it. I'm learning and it's gonna be a process.  I haven't been doing such a good job at "releasing" and I've been filled with so much tension.  Stressed about so many different things has started to catch up to me and it's no wonder my Meniere's has been terrible lately.  I need to find an outlet, fast.  He's such a happy guy and the way he explains his happiness is definitely something worth trying.  I'm not saying that I'm not happy, it's just that I've been a lot more stressed and frustrated, lately.  That is not good!  Ugh.  It's a process and won't come overnight, but I'm hopeful for a good change to come about. 


*I had a date last Thursday evening.  I went to see Bourne Legacy with the Baker.  It was ok, both the movie and the date.  I'm still learning things about the Baker and vice versa.  I appreciate the way he communicates with me.  I know communication is very important in a relationship/friendship, but sometimes I tend to fail at that when feelings & a man are involved.   Sometimes, when I get frustrated, I don't know how to communicate my feelings properly.   Not all men read minds like Mr. Red (seriously, he can read me so perfectly that it scares/fascinates me), but I also shouldn't be comparing guys.  Anyways, Baker...I like him and he likes me.  We're doing this lil thing called, "dating" and I'm learning what that's all about....learning about him....learning about myself..... man, it's different.  I'm glad he's so patient because I tend to fail at that, he's willing to talk through a problem and find a solution and how he can be part of the solution.  I really like that.  Well, we'll see where this all goes..... so yep, I'm dating someone.  Wow, that thought still seems a lil foreign to me.  I guess it's because Baker & I have been friends since last year, but I never thought it'd really get to this point of "dating".  Oh well, I'll get use to it...  

G'nite.  Tomorrow my "plan" starts....wish me luck! 

A July Quickie....

*Oh I love me some wedding blogs: http://ohdarlingwedding.blogspot.com/

*My Meniere's has been kicking my arse more than ever.  Seriously, it sucks.  My head feels like it's in a constant tailspin. I feel like I have to be constantly moving, to fight against the Vertigo that sets in.  I'm sure to those around me, it looks like I can't sit still.  If I try to sit still I feel like I'm gonna fall out of my seat.  Stupid Meniere's Disease!

*My nephew Bub has been here for the last week and it's been so wonderful having him around.  I've become so accustomed to him not living here, which is a good thing because I tend to hold on too tightly to my nephews & niece.  What can I say, I love them so much!  Bub leaves for his TWO YEAR mission in about a month.  Man, I'm not ready to not having him a phone call away.  

*My niece returned back to school this week.  Time flies by so quickly!  I like when kids are out for the summer because I feel like they're able to just be kids and carefree.  Sometimes I think the world asks them to grow up too quickly.  

*My calling at church has been getting better.  I'm the Family Home Evening Committee Chair (I think that's a stupid name since I'm obviously not the "Chairman".....can't I just be the "FHE Prez" or the "FHE Mama"?) and I've finally added to my committee.  I finally got smart and added some friends to the committee, which makes a difference.  Sometimes the call feels a lil daunting since I still don't know the ward as much as I'd like to.  I just want everyone to come out to FHE and have a great time.  

*I don't know if much has improved since laaaaaaast Saturday.  Sometimes, I want to go out of my way to help my Dad with a particular task, but then I don't want to become a doormat later.  I was talking with my Mom today, but I made sure not to say too much.  I've always wished I had the type of Mother/Daughter relationship that I could openly talk and share my thoughts & feelings with.  Sadly, I don't and I need to be on guard of the things I share with my parents because it'd be like giving them ammo for later.  When I was dating & later broke it off with Morgan, I thought I could share lil things with my Mom....you know, how most Mom & daughters talk.  It didn't matter because she ended up using it against me in an argument.  I've learned a lot from my parents, both good and bad.  My heart will forever long to have a ideal relationship with my parents. I don't think this will ever happen. If ever I'm blessed with the opportunity to be a parent, I hope my kids will trust me enough to talk and share their lives with me.  I hope they'll know how much I'll love them, by word and deed.  

*I started to talk to Logan again, thinking we could try to be friends....  He's TOO hung up on the fact that I'm Mormon.  He continually compares me to the Mormons he knew up in Utah.  It's like I have to prove to him that I'm not like that, nor am I your typical Mormon.  He thinks I know nothing about the Catholic religion, that ALL my time is spent on church stuff, that ALL my friends are Mormons and basically I have no life outside of church.  I just couldn't do it anymore. I hate when I have to prove myself on anything, it means that someone's not believing me....as if I'm lying.  Grrr!!  So yet again, I've said good bye to Logan. This time it's for good.  GRRR MEN!

*Oh speaking of which... I didn't go to Pride.  My Meniere's was a huge factor in it.  I just couldn't handle the dizzy head and didn't want the lack of sleep and extreme sun to add to it.  I'm kinda bummed, but there's always next year.  

Meniere's....this weekend....LGBT.

Man, Meniere's is kicking my trash today!! Ugh, so frustrating and stressful.  Which incidentally, stress makes my Meniere's worse.  It's a double edge sword! :-/

I'm looking forward to this weekend.  I've got some awesome friends in town and look forward to hanging out with them tomorrow night!! Oh yeah!! Kanikapila!! Kanikapila is what they call a "jam session" in Hawaii.  People play their ukuleles & guitars.  Sometimes there's singing and occasionally there's hula dancing.  I love times like that!

So.... I won't be at church on Sunday, I'll be at the San Diego LGBT Pride with PajamaPants.  I'm glad we can still be friends and support each other, despite our differences.  On my last birthday, he sat by my side, in church, and reassured me that I'd do well on the song I had to sing that day.   This Sunday, I'll be by his side supporting his happiness, but most of all supporting my dear friend. 
Part of me worries what new friends/acquaintances may think of this decision to skip church and go to Pride.  Am I gay? No.  Going to an LGBT event doesn't make me gay, any more than going to the beach makes me a surfer.  I figure that people may judge, but go ahead... "What comes around, goes around."  

June/July

*Today's been an emotionally exhausting day.  Didn't expect my day to start out with an argument that would only lead to crying.   I'm so sleepy and my Meniere's has been terrible lately.

*I went on a date, Friday night, to The Prado.  The food was scrumptious!!!  Just like the server said, the Braised Beef was so tender I could cut it with a spoon!  Loved it! We ate outside on the terrace and had a lovely view of Balboa Park.  My chocolate dessert was delectable!  VERY enjoyable evening.  Do I like the guy?  Hmm, not sure yet.  "Logan" was very nice, but he is 14 years older than me and lives about 45 minutes northeast of SD.  We'll see when he gets back from his trip, next week.

*The day of my date with Logan, I received an invite for a hang out at Sonny's place.  A group of friends were gonna meet up at Sonny's, soak in the jacuzzi, swim in the pool and watch a flick. I was torn! I wanted to go to Sonny's, but Logan already made reservations and I just couldn't back out.    I was gonna try to go to both, but our stroll around Balboa Park was longer than expected.

*As much as I enjoyed going out with Logan, I couldn't help but think of Sonny. I made up my mind that I would ask Sonny out.  So I did, after our Softball game on Saturday.  We chatted about some church stuff and then I just asked. Here's how it went....


Ehu: Hey Sonny, I was just wondering, would you like to go out sometime?  I was thinking some frozen yogurt.
Sonny: Oh, um.... {intense thinking face}
Ehu: Well I know we couldn't do it tonight because of the stake BBQ.  Do you ever do things on Sunday?
Sonny: Sometimes.
Ehu: Is tomorrow one of those "sometimes" Sundays?
Sonny: Well today's my niece's birthday, so I don't know if we're celebrating today or tomorrow and I've gotta go buy her a gift.
Ehu: Oh ok, and I know next weekend's out of the question since you'll be out of town.
Sonny: Yeah.... {intense thinking face now looks a lil confused}
Ehu: Well alright, we can figure something out.
Sonny: Oh alright.
Ehu: I gotta get going, so I'll just catch you later.
Sonny: See ya.


Yep, that's how it went.  I ended up seeing him later that evening at the BBQ.  We talked for a tiny bit and ended up playing Ping Pong together.  We wagered Phil's BBQ, and I lost.  Later that night, I was talking with a friend from the ward, who told me that she had invited Sonny and his roommate over for dinner.  She insisted that I come over because then I would be able to hang out with Sonny.  I thought that would be a great idea!  During church, my friend reminded me of her dinner, to which I asked if it was confirmed if Sonny was going to be there. She said that he was definitely going to be there with his roommate.  I bowed out of the dinner.  I saw him a lot on Saturday and just didn't feel like it would be such a good idea to go.  Then I started to think, "What happened to his niece's birthday party? Was that his way of nicely telling me he wasn't interested?"  Probably was. 

*I haven't mentioned that my friend Mare is in town from Utah!!!! We've been friends for about 13 years!

It's been so great having her here!! We hung out at Coronado Beach after my Softball games and went to the Mormon Battalion Center.  We met a new guy in my ward, and he tagged along.  We ended up at Cafe Coyote afterwards, drinking Mocktails and swapping hilariously scandalous stories! Goooooooooood times!

Thursday dinner & this and that.

Tonight, I'll be having dinner with Mr. Red, his gf and her kids.  Awkward, right? Well, only if I want it to be.  But seriously,  I mean, I'm glad that he's so excited to have me meet her, but in the same breath I'm nervous.  I don't have the best poker face, so its very apparent what I'm thinking and feeling.  Plus, Mr. Red knows me better than all of my friends, so he knows if I'm holding back or not being myself.  Besides, it's hard enough meeting someone, but to meet their kids also?! Oh geez, can this get any harder?!  We haven't talked or hung out since January, so when we talked on the phone yesterday, I'm glad he was still the same Mr. Red.  He says that she's the female version of himself.   Man.....  wish me luck tonight.

I hung out with Tat, late last night.  He's one of my childhood [church] friends.  I'm glad that we're still friends.  I like the perspective he gives me when I'm trying to understand what the heck goes through mens minds, sometimes.  But I'm grateful for Tat because he's so open minded, doesn't judge and there's never been any awkward sexual tension between us.  He's pretty awesome. 

HEY MAY!

*Here's a lil video of my bike ride with Liz.  It was a great ride to Coronado, but on the way back, we were biking into the wind--which makes it very tiring and difficult.  So yes, we're out of breath, but trying to laugh and have a good time!  Can I just say how HARD it is to bike with one hand, let alone trying to take pictures and record a video!  And in case you never knew, biking and laughing is VERY hard to do as well! Makes for a very wobbly ride.

My sister made the BOMB biscuits on Sunday. Yep, just like the ones they make at Red Lobster. Oh man, they were DELICIOUS!!  I think I ate a dozen......or very close to it.  I'm starting to love Sunday/family dinners again.  For a very long time they were hard, but now, due to the SCRUMPTIOUS food we've been having, it makes it so enjoyable. 

*I met up with Freshman15, the other night.  Well, it was fun, but I think it just reaffirms my desire to take a break from guys & dating.  He was way cute, but, we want two very different things right now.  Besides, I'm going to be VERY busy because...

*I'll be moving this week.  It won't be far, at all. {plus side, I'll only be 2.2 miles from the beach! AWESOME!!}  But I'm just tired of moving.  I never had to do it before my mission, then in the first month of my mission, I did it 4 times.  After my mission, I did it about 4 times within the first 18 months of being back {college}.  Then in Dec. 2010....and now, this week.  I hate packing, as is...so moving, to me, is "PACKING x DEATH".  Ok, maybe not that extreme, but I just can't stand it! Which is difficult because....

*My Meniere's has been pretty bad lately.  Not only has the "whooshing" in my left ear increased, I'm dizzy a lot more.  I just hope it doesn't get worse, to the point of falling because of extreme light headedness.  Just the thought of moving is already mentally tiring and I haven't even started packing. 

*Be positive Ehu.... Change can be good, remember?  

SLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUG.

I took a Tylenol PM to help me sleep last night. I do this on occasion when I need some good, deep, uninterrupted sleep.  Ideally, it's best to take it early in the evening so that the after effects are lost while you sleep.   However, if you take it too late, you end up feeling hammered or sluggish the next day. Example: Me.

Oh man, seriously, my body's waaaaaaay too relaxed and I could fall asleep at the drop of a hat.   But I did get the best sleep imaginable last night. So thankful for it!!!  Especially because my Meniere's has been acting up lately. It's like a Catch-22 with Meniere's and sleep.  I can't sleep because of the Meniere's (more so the Tinnitus part of Meniere's) which makes me fatigue which sometimes stresses me out and makes my Meniere's worse, then the Vertigo part sets in and makes sleeping impossible.  See, it's a vicious round. It sucks, but stressing over it doesn't help me because stress, whether good or bad is just BAD! ("good stress", as described by my doctor, "is like anticipating an upcoming vacation or happy event"). 

So taking Tylenol PM is a blessing and a curse.  Right now, I'm feeling the curse part of it and could surely use a nap........oh man!

H@PPY THU®SD@Y!!

You know you're draggin' when....

...someone says, "You're tired. You can tell in your voice."

Dang, that's pretty bad.

Oh yeah, and here's an "interesting" Q&A I had with a guy this week:

Me: "What's your favorite restaurant?"

Him: "Jack in a Box. Oh wait, Carl's Jr. Well actually both!"

Me: "Oh. Ok."

....
Me: "What cologne do you like to wear?"

Him: "Axe."

On what planet is Jack in a Box a restaurant and Axe is a cologne?! 

Pues.

Ehu vs. Meniere's

Man, I feel like it's been kickin' my trash lately.  And it has.  
On Sunday, I had to hold my neck while speaking because my Tinnitus was getting pretty loud in my left ear. I haven't had to do that for a long time.  I'm getting worried.  The fact that my ear has had the "whooshing" sound in it lately isn't a good sign.  The Vertigo spells will start again...which they kind of have already.  I NEED to decompress and stop stressing. 
Both good and bad stress isn't good for Meniere's.  I've been having a lot of both lately.  No bueno.
Fatigue has been setting in a lot more lately.  This also isn't good.  When someone would mention Fatigue, I thought they were just sleepy.  Fatigue is more than that; it's a constant feeling of weariness, tiredness, or lack of energy.
Unfortunately there's no cure for Meniere's.  That totally bites. However, there are ways to curb its symptoms.  Oh well, I'll do my best, be glad to have what health I do have and be grateful for loved ones and a Relief Society Presidency that helps me along the way.  The blessing in all of this is that I learn how to handle stress a little better, enjoy activities that promote decompression and have more empathy for those with chronic illnesses.  

Relief.

Today, for the first time in a VERY LONG time, I can hear.

I don't have the constant "whooshing" sound in my left ear. (It sounds like I'm listening to my heartbeat through a stethoscope)

I'm so extremely happy, I could cry. I forgot what it was like NOT having that damn "whooshing". As I type this, tears well up in my eyes. Usually the only way I can get relief from the "whooshing" is to press on my neck--it looks as though I'm taking a pulse on my neck. It looks a lil funny, but I don't care if it brings relief.

Today is a VERY VERY good day. I'm so happy!

Life & Reality

What's on my mind....

Last night was hard. This Meniere's is really kicking my trash. I went home and went straight to bed. Of course the 3.5 hours of sleep from the night before also aided me in that decision, but I just wanted to be in bed and listen to my iPod. I tried to fall asleep but I couldn't stay asleep. Then I hit my breaking point. Crying uncontrollably, so miserable from this constant noise in my left ear. I just wanted my head to explode--no really, I wouldn't have minded at all. The pressure of crying so hard, the pressure of a 'tired' migraine, the pressure of just trying to LIVE with this Meniere's CRAP...... I just broke!! I'm so blessed to have a sister as awesome as mine. I went to her room, sobbing, and she just listened to me. I was VERY brutally honest in what I had to say and what was going through my mind. It was a lot of life + reality. I felt better, a lil relieved to have someone know how I honestly feel about my life with Meniere's.

I'm just glad that today's Thursday....my nephew Bubba's flying in for the weekend and on Sunday we get to talk to my missionary nephew, Elder Lomu!! I'm so stoked!

Whoa is me Wednesday.

Today was a definite "CALGON TAKE ME AWAY"day!!!!!!

My docking station at work for my iPod DIED.... I don't know what happened to it, but it wouldn't work. So AAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY it was annoyingly QUIET!!!!!!! I can't function without music.

Without the background music, AAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLL DDDDDDAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY I could hear my left ear "whooshing"....LOUDLY!!!!

I would really like to rip my ear drum out.... I could care less if I could hear out of my left ear anymore. I'm so sick and tired of the damn "whooshing" in my left ear...as well as the ringing in my right ear. I hate the way this Meniere's Disease is taking over my life.

Meniere's Disease.....

This past weekend was spent in bed. Kinda nice, kinda not....

For the last year I've been living with Meniere's Disease. I hate it, I truly do. I would never wish it upon my worst enemy. I don't know how it started or why I have it, but I do. There's no cure for it, all I can do is just live with it. Somedays are better than others and I'm learning how to better cope with it. My biggest worry is that I will lose more of my hearing, thus effecting my singing and piano playing. Of course I worry about loss of employment, losing my driving ability and not being able to travel [flying], but I'd be so bummed if music was effected.

I just wanted to post some information about what the heck this Meniere's Disease is all about:

Meniere's Disease is a disorder of the inner ear that causes abnormal sensory perceptions, including a sensation of a spinning motion (vertigo), hearing loss usually in one ear, fullness or pressure in the same ear, and ringing in the same ear (tinnitus).

The primary signs and symptoms of Meniere's disease are:

• Recurring episodes of vertigo. Vertigo is similar to the sensation you experience if you spin around quickly several times and suddenly stop. You feel as if the room is still spinning, and you lose your balance. Episodes of vertigo occur without warning and usually last 20 minutes to two hours or more. Severe vertigo can cause nausea and vomiting.
  
• Hearing loss in Meniere's disease may fluctuate, particularly early in the course of the disease. Eventually, most people experience some degree of permanent hearing loss.
  
• Tinnitus is the perception of a ringing, buzzing, roaring, whistling or hissing sound in your ear.
  
• Aural fullness. Aural fullness is the feeling of fullness or pressure in the ear.

What is the treatment for Meniere's disease?
There is no cure for Meniere’s disease, but your doctor can suggest ways to manage your symptoms. He or she may recommend that you try to control the attacks by changing your diet. You will probably have to limit your salt intake. Controlling the level of salt in your body will indirectly control the amount of fluid in your inner ear. A medicine called a diuretic (water pill) may also help. You should limit the amount of caffeine and alcohol in your diet, and quit smoking if you smoke. Your doctor can prescribe medicine to relieve feelings of dizziness and nausea. These medicines may cause you to feel sleepy. In serious cases of Meniere's disease (when attacks can't be controlled by diet or medicine), surgery may be necessary.

Sucks, right?? I know....but it could be worse! Thank goodness it's not...for now.

5 for Friday.

1. Sometimes 'Ignorance is Bliss". Sometimes. I've started to learn more about my Meniere's Disease. I know for sure that I would NEVER wish this upon my worst enemy. I feel like I have to be hopeful. I'm scared it could get worse then the constant 'whooshing' & 'ringing' in my ears. I've started to get dizzy and my balance is thrown off easily. I just found out that this 'disease' is commonly known for falling. It scares me, a lot. It's already happen before and luckily I was home. I don't know what my future looks like with this disease. I've got an MRI scheduled in a couple weeks and I hope and pray that relief is in the near future. Starting next month, I'll be on a break from the temple. I love the temple, but I need my health to be better. I'll miss the sisters, all of whom I love dearly. It's sometimes hard for me to function in the temple. With my current position, I need to be able to hear clearly--not my strongest asset right now. Plus, sometimes I've felt so dizzy where I feel like I'm about to fall/faint. We'll see how it works out.

2. I got to see Atticus today. Just for a little bit. He looked so dang cute. I REALLY hope he goes to the Christmas work party tomorrow.

3. Can I just say, there is something fascinating about dry cleaning. Weird, I know. But that's the truth. I was so excited to get my dry cleaning back tonight for my work Christmas party tomorrow evening. Picking up my dress from the dry cleaners made me feel like I was going to an important, fancy grown up party (still weird, I know...just stick with me on this.) When the dry cleaning lady brought my dress to the front, there was a line of women behind me. My [birthday] dress looked so spectacular! I felt so proud that such a beautiful garment was mine! I walked out of the dry cleaners so elated and excited to wear my special dress! I LOVE the way I feel and look in this dress! I can't wait to put it on!

4. I was so irritated at work today. My work partner and I were in charge of the office potluck. We put up a sign up sheet last Thursday--the day before payday. 5 out of 30 people signed up. It was really disappointing! About 10 brought food...yet those who typically don't bring ANYTHING were the first to grab a plate of food! I was so mad!! 10 minutes into the potluck most of the food was gone and I even brought something! I was livid! I took back my 'White Elephant' gift, stormed out of the office and left for lunch!! I'm done with office potlucks! Office potlucks = free lunch for everyone else.

5. Tomorrow night is my work Christmas party at the Gaslamp Marriot! I'm so stoked!! I can't wait!! I get to hang out with one of my dearest friends, PajamaPants. He ALWAYS makes any situation BETTER and A LOT more FUN!! I seriously hope Atticus goes. He hasn't been feeling well, but he's already told a friend about it so he doesn't want to back out. I'm so dang excited, I cannot wait!! And then there's the after party at Altitude Sky Lounge. OH BABY, ALWAYS SUCH FUN TIMES!!! I can't wait!!!