Yesterday I hung out with one of my closest guy friends, PajamaPants. I love him dearly, he's one of my best friends. I'm grateful for friends that I can be extremely brutally honest with. I appreciate relationships like that, full of trust. I'm very glad I spent the evening with him because I felt calmer, happier, hopeful....more of my old self. It was good :) Thank you PJ.
Last night, I emailed my cousin who's a Psychologist/Therapist and asked if I could talk with her. Whatever this 'funk' is that I'm going through, I want it gone. Ending one's life is not the answer. It's a very selfish choice, I know. My cousin emailed me back this morning and at the end of her email she said, "Hang in there"....and I think that's what I've gotta do. Those are very hopeful words. I've been thinking a lot about what "hope" is. I can't be 100% optimistic, but I can be hopeful. I can hope that I'll be able to cope with this Meniere's. I can hope that life will turn up. I can hope to hang in there....and I think that's pretty good.
