Saturday, November 8, 2014

Baby dreams.

I took a lil nap this afternoon, and had an odd dream. I'd try to write it in my journal, but typing seemed a lil faster...
I dreamt that I was an IT for a SEAL team.  Our SEAL team was called up to go on a mission, but this was my first mission as an IT. (Don't ask me what SEAL team has an IT??) As I looked at the guys on my team, I obviously did not look like a typical SEAL member.  I went to work, in the evening, thinking it would be a typical IT day. Before going into the office, I found out I was pregnant...three months pregnant. After the announcement came at work that we would be going on a mission the next morning, we were told that we couldn't leave.  It was imperative that we sleep the night there so we could all prepare ourselves for the next day's events.  I looked at the guys and they were all mentally focused and quietly preparing themselves.  I had never been on a mission nor ever expected to go on one!  They SEALs knew that of all the tasks that needed to happen, I needed to be returned safely at the end of the mission.  I didn't know how to prepare myself or be calm about it! I was freaking out and wanting to go see Levi to say good-bye.  I told my commanding officer that I had important news that I wanted and needed to share with my husband, especially since I didn't know if I'd be coming back or not.  He told me that leaving the office would be detrimental to the team and myself.  I started to rethink telling Levi because if something did happen to me, I wouldn't want him to feel the pain of loss of both his wife and his unborn child. I was over the moon about being pregnant and wanted to scream it from the rooftops.  I wanted to share this elation with my sweetheart, but at the same time, the seriousness of the mission would be compromised if I left.  Somehow, I think I was able to get to Levi, who was apparently working at a car dealership, and I remember the exquisite joy we shared over knowing that we were going to be parents!  It was a blissful moment for us as we embraced so tenderly. Levi's face was so beautiful as he received the news, he looked happier than I had ever seen him.
Then that was it....I woke up.  No mission.  No baby.  I wish I could have seen our baby, that would have been nice.  My Dad has had a dream or two of my future baby.  He said that he was holding a lil baby boy with blonde curls.  I remember how happy & emotional my Dad was telling me about his dream about my future baby boy.  It makes me wonder, that's for sure. Someday. :)

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