"A new normal"

Today's been rough. I used to call my parents on Sundays because it was the day after my Dad's dialysis so he'd usually be more energized.

I still try to call my Mom on Sundays. It's hard. It's hard not to just ask for my Dad, like usual. Today, we talked for about 40 minutes, just her and I.  I guess this is our new normal.

I miss saying, "Hi Dad!" My chest feels hollow today. I miss last Sunday. I had all my loved ones in one place.  

I know I still have so much to blog/journal about, but it's so difficult to think about certain things and rehash certain experiences.

All I know is that I miss my Dad more and more and just when I think I'm doing better, my chest bottoms out and my heart just sinks, like a ton of bricks have fallen all over me, repeatedly. Sometimes it's a task just to breathe. I try to act normal and BE normal, but I'm still adjusting to this new normal. 

I miss him more than I'll ever be able to describe and sometimes I don't know how life can just be normal and happy again. This is the hardest challenge of my life. 

The ride home tonight.

On the way home tonight, from visiting with my sister and niece, I broke down crying. I didn't cry much today and thought it was successful that I only cried once until the ride home.

It's still hard for me to drive through IB without thinking of where I used to live with them about 4 years ago and where they lived up until last year. It made me miss them as we passed that neighborhood and it made me think of my Dad. Slowly the water works started to happen. A few freeway exits later, I was full on sobbing. I told Levi that I don't think my heart will ever fully heal from this. I think my heart will forever feel like a chunk is missing. Some say that time heals wounds but I just don't feel like all the time in the world will heal this. It's only been about 1.5 days and it already feels like a very long time. I'm only 36 years old and I've got a very long time before I'll see him again. I can't wrap my head around it and my heart can't handle this separation. I want to talk to him. I want to hear his voice in return. I hate this. I hate this so much. I try to think of how I dealt with this when my Kuku & Tutu passed away 15 & 14 years ago. I miss hearing their voices. I miss conversing with them.  

I'm selfish because I just want my Dad here. I look at old photos and I wish I could have my Dad stand next to me again. I just want to hear his voice say my name again. 

As we were sharing stories at my sister's tonight, I just couldn't believe I forgot about my time spent with him on Friday (August 4). When I went into his room, after our road trip out to Vegas, he reached for my hand and slowly brought it up to his mouth. He kissed the back of my hand. I honestly don't remember much of my brief moment with him because I was sleep deprived and longing for a nap. 

Part of me wants to kick myself for not spending more time with him that day.  The more I think about it, I get angry at myself for all those missed opportunities. Then it makes me sad. It's such a vicious cycle when you're grieving. 

I feel like I've rubbed my face raw from the continuous crying. I just can't imagine this world without my Dad in it. I'm grateful I have an eternity with him. I'm going to need it. 

My Dad.

I just want the world to stop with me for a day or two. I just want to look at photos of my Dad. I want to listen to all of the voicemails I have saved on my phone. I want to share all of my most treasured stories and memories of him. I want to hear his voice again. My eyes and face are so red and swollen from crying all day.  I'm so sleepy but I can't sleep. The first few seconds upon waking up are blissful because I forget the pain for just a moment. Then it hits me, like a ton of bricks. All over again, it hits me hard like the air is knocked out of me completely. I've sobbed so many times during the day today and I know I am not done crying.  I've never experienced heartache and loss like this before. It is the worst pain and emptiness I have ever felt. 

I miss my Dad. My heart is trying to understand what my mind knows of the eternal plan of my Heavenly Father. For now, I am selfish and I want to hold my Dad again, right now. I wish I could hear my Dad's voice reassure me at this time. 

I just hope that my Dad knows how much I will always love him. 

The Last 2 Weeks!

Man, the last 2 weeks have been BUSY.
I didn't even really get to post much about Father's Day.  It was a wonderful time spent with family.  I always love seeing my Dad.  I'll definitely have to post more about my Dad, SOON!
Last week was FULL of training, since my partner was going to be out on vacation this past week.  Wait, did that make sense? 2 weeks ago we trained...5 days of drinking out of a firehose.  Seriously, it was a lot and I think it started to take a toll on both of us.  Thankfully, I totally like my partner and I get the feeling that it's mutual.  She's way chill and funny, which helps since we work closely with each other.  So this past week of work was better than I expected!!! Seriously, I'm so lucky.  I thank my lucky stars and my Heavenly Father that I was able to endure it and come out on top!! The cool part is that my boss let me "spin the wheel".  It's a little incentive for our department and our other offices.  You could spin anywhere from $25 - $100.  I LUCKILY spun and landed on the one $100 spot!  I was stoked!  It was a great way to start a Thursday!
To start this past week, Levi and I were asked to speak in church.  I'm not gonna lie, I was nervous for both of us  We had a week to prepare and this would be Levi's first talk, EVER!  True to form, Levi was calm, funny and informative. Also true to form, I was nervous, emotional (it was on the Priesthood, so I spoke about my Dad) and VERY teary eyed.  I couldn't have been more proud of Levi.  Seriously, so many ward members came up to introduce themselves and compliment us....mostly him and I was perfectly ok with that.  He did an amazing job.
I'm so thankful that life is going to slow down for a little bit, that we can both get into the rhythm of our jobs and figure out having one partial day off together.  Saturdays are definitely different and somewhat lonely.  Saturdays used to be our adventure day.  It's ok though, we've just become more creative with our adventures now.  Until next time....ciao!  

Sunday & Father's Day.

There's so much I want to blog about but it's late and I don't want to pull out my laptop. Plus it's 12:50am on a work night....eek!

Today we were asked to speak in church. Next Sunday: What the Priesthood means in our lives.

As for the rest of our day:

I love this man! I enjoy the time I get to spend with him. 

Sorry so short, my mind is consumed with my talk. Nervous, excited, anxious and happy! Good luck to us!

Day 4.

I've never been this exhausted before. I am physically, mentally and emotionally spent. I just want to go home and sleep longer than 2 hours at a time. I want to sleep on my perfectly comfortable bed. I want to see my husband for more than 2 hours. I just want to sleep and feel like a human again. 

Just seeing my husband and being able to speak in complete sentences, at a normal volume, was so great. Plus, to be able to laugh and be funny was even better. I miss being able to just communicate like that with another person. I miss laughter. It was nice to decompress for a very short moment, last night. 

I just want to go home and sit on my couch with bare feet. I miss the peace of my home and the gentleness of Levi's voice. I feel like half of my heart is missing from my chest. I feel incomplete without him by my side. Going to sleep on my massage table is hard, for so many reasons, but not having him by my side is the hardest.  

I'm doing what I'm doing because I love my Dad. I know he would do the same if the roles were reversed. He's been thanking me profusely since I arrived Friday night. I know he's grateful. Last night, he thanked me for my service. That means a lot to me, coming from the person who always taught me about service, by example.

To which I am grateful for...

On our drive back home tonight, I was thinking of all the things I am grateful for.

After so many years of crushes, dates, sappy chick flicks, crying, impatience, praying & hoping, I am so truly grateful to have a good man by my side. He is everything I could have hoped to find in a good partner. I appreciate his patience. God knew I would need a man with an endless supply of love & patience. Levi makes my life more rich and exciting. I am so deeply blessed.

I am thankful that my relationship with my parents has improved, especially with my Mom. It's nice to be able to communicate well.

I'm blessed with a good sister (a.k.a. Ex Sister-in-Law) who loves and cares for my Dad. I'm thankful I can turn to her when it comes to my Dad's medical history and she's willing to assist in anyway possible. It's reassuring to know that I'm not alone in this experience.

Man, am I grateful for Buzz. When I met him and his wife Reed 11 years ago, I didn't know how deep they would be ingrained in my heart. They are two of the best people to come into the life of my family. In fact, they are family! They have done so much for me and every single person in my family. They are the salt of the earth. Tonight, when I called Buzz, who was out to dinner with his family & his brothers' families, he said that he & his brothers would rush right over to help give my Dad a Priesthood blessing. The way they came in and encircled my Dad with love and friendship was truly beautiful. They love my Dad and it was witnessed in the words of the blessing.

I am thankful for my Dad. I don't think I'll ever be able to adequately express how much he and my Mom have done for me.  But my Dad, he's taught me everything I know about service. He's an honest man. There's no BS with him, he's a straight shooter and you'll know exactly where you stand with him. He's definitely one of a kind. Sometimes I see a little bit more of him in me and that makes me all the more grateful.

I am thankful for a loving Heavenly Father who has placed people in my life to buoy me up when the waves of life get to be too much. He has truly blessed me with a circle of angels. 

Saturday Night Blessings

#shortblogpost #longlistofblessings

#ManCrushMonday: My Dad.

This makes my heart swell tonight

That's my Dad with the paddle. I sure do love him. Have I ever mentioned that he was in a movie with Elvis Presley? (Paradise, Hawaiian Style)

My Dad is the coolest! Just tonight I called him because I wanted him to translate something that was in Polynesian. Now when I say "Polynesian" it's because I wasn't sure if it was Tongan, Samoan or Fijian....all of which he knows, and more!

My Dad, there's no one quite like him. He's fearless, blunt and serves with all his heart. I'm lucky to be his daughter. 

Baby dreams.

I took a lil nap this afternoon, and had an odd dream. I'd try to write it in my journal, but typing seemed a lil faster...
I dreamt that I was an IT for a SEAL team.  Our SEAL team was called up to go on a mission, but this was my first mission as an IT. (Don't ask me what SEAL team has an IT??) As I looked at the guys on my team, I obviously did not look like a typical SEAL member.  I went to work, in the evening, thinking it would be a typical IT day. Before going into the office, I found out I was pregnant...three months pregnant. After the announcement came at work that we would be going on a mission the next morning, we were told that we couldn't leave.  It was imperative that we sleep the night there so we could all prepare ourselves for the next day's events.  I looked at the guys and they were all mentally focused and quietly preparing themselves.  I had never been on a mission nor ever expected to go on one!  They SEALs knew that of all the tasks that needed to happen, I needed to be returned safely at the end of the mission.  I didn't know how to prepare myself or be calm about it! I was freaking out and wanting to go see Levi to say good-bye.  I told my commanding officer that I had important news that I wanted and needed to share with my husband, especially since I didn't know if I'd be coming back or not.  He told me that leaving the office would be detrimental to the team and myself.  I started to rethink telling Levi because if something did happen to me, I wouldn't want him to feel the pain of loss of both his wife and his unborn child. I was over the moon about being pregnant and wanted to scream it from the rooftops.  I wanted to share this elation with my sweetheart, but at the same time, the seriousness of the mission would be compromised if I left.  Somehow, I think I was able to get to Levi, who was apparently working at a car dealership, and I remember the exquisite joy we shared over knowing that we were going to be parents!  It was a blissful moment for us as we embraced so tenderly. Levi's face was so beautiful as he received the news, he looked happier than I had ever seen him.
Then that was it....I woke up.  No mission.  No baby.  I wish I could have seen our baby, that would have been nice.  My Dad has had a dream or two of my future baby.  He said that he was holding a lil baby boy with blonde curls.  I remember how happy & emotional my Dad was telling me about his dream about my future baby boy.  It makes me wonder, that's for sure. Someday. :)

Birthday Blessings.

A couple weeks ago, my parents told me that they wanted to take me out to eat for my birthday.  They said to choose a restaurant and we could invite a few people.  Yesterday, we went to eat at one of my most favorite sushi restaurants, in Imperial Beach.  When Levi and I showed up, we were a few minutes late, but my parents, sister, nephew, niece, cousin's family & aunt were already there.  I walked in and they started cheering.  I hugged & kissed everyone then walked over to the seat that had a birthday balloon tied to it.  Next to my seat was a huge gift bag and several other birthday bags on top.

 In the middle of the table was a red & white birthday cake.  Needless to say, I felt so special.  The rest of our party showed up and then we ordered some yummy goodness! Man I love me some sushi, tempura shrimp & veggies!

 I was lucky to sit next to my Dad and get to chat with him.  It's always so good to see my Dad.  Time seems to fly by between each visit and it makes me miss him so much.
After we ate, we did the whole birthday cake schpeal and opened gifts.  Whenever it's my birthday and people are singing "Happy Birthday to You", it's always a lil awkward.  I never know what to do. Most times I just stare at the candles and think of my birthday wish.  Sometimes I just wanna sing along.  It's just an awkward moment...
My Mom got me a Red Velvet Cake.  It was really good!  I really love Red Velvet Cake!  I was touched that she remembered my favorite cake.  So delish!    

 Afterwards, I opened my presents.  I got a soy coconut candle.  I can't wait to burn it! It smells like surf wax, I love it!  Makes me miss the beach even more.

 I also received a shell box with a pretty shell pendant. 

I also received a card with some money from my Aunt K. It was so nice of her.  I was just so touched by everyone's kindness and generosity.  

The gift that touched my heart so deeply, was the big gift bag from my parents. Inside the huge bag was a box that had many different things wrapped up in it.  My parents got me (us) "Chinese plates".,,,Asian themed...whatevers, you get the idea. (I hate having to be so PC sometimes!) Anyways, I was, am, still so touched by their gift.  I wanna cry just looking at the plates, saimin bowls, rice bowls, and soup spoons they gave us.  

I feel like it's a little piece of my family here with me.  My Mom & Dad will never know just how touched I was by everything they did for me.  Even as I type this, I'm crying because I just want to embrace my parents dearly and thank them for making me feel so special on Saturday.  This little birthday party was probably the nicest, kindest, most generous, and thoughtful thing they've done for me.  I can't wait to use the plates & bowls.  
I think I'm also quite sentimental over their generosity is because I miss them.  I wish we lived closer to them because sometimes it's hard not seeing them daily, if not weekly.  I will remember this birthday luncheon for a very long time.  Just all of it, every detail that my parents had a hand in, has touched me so much.  I just want to thank them so much.  It was so tremendously thoughtful and I will remember this for a very, very long time.  

Random + Character Reference + Life in March

*Tonight, one of my best friends asked me to write a character reference letter for their court appearance.  Of course this was easy to do, because I have nothing bad to say about this person.  It made me think of what would be said for me, if I was ever in need of such a reference letter.  I guess it's the same for what I hope is said in my obituary some day.... I hope it's filled with good and funny things. 

*My sister's birthday was this past Wednesday.  We chatted that day, but I wasn't able to call or visit her.  Perhaps I'll swing by tomorrow, since I'll be down in her neck o' woods for....

*My Dad's birthday is tomorrow...I guess technically today.  I can't believe how old he is.  Time flies by so quickly.  Sometimes I look at him and wish he were 50 years younger.  I often wonder what it would be like to have been friends with my parents, at my age.   Sometimes I miss his laugh and his funny jokes, especially his magic tricks.  I'm glad I get to see my Dad tomorrow.

*Work is going pretty well, at least I think so.   Sometimes it's very interesting reading through certain court documents, as I prepare case files.  So far, I like everyone I work with.  Everyone's so nice, welcoming and positive.  I would most certain enjoy working there for MANY years to come.  A chick was fired this last week, oh man, it made me remember when I was fired once.  Dude, once you're fired you NEVER want to relive that experience again.  I felt for her because it all happened in about 2 minutes!  I don't know what she did or didn't do, but damn it definitely lit a fire under my butt because for the rest of the afternoon I pumped out those case files like no one's business!

*Jackass 3D just came on tv (censored)....oh man, some of that junk makes me crack up!!  Duck Hunting--YES!!!

*Levi and I went to see 300: Rise of an Empire today.  Intense!! 

*Hermanita and I went to San Diego Home Cooking this past Thursday.  Oh man, SUPER FRIGGIN DELISH!! I was tellling Tat about it, and now we'll be going back on Tuesday with Brighty.  It's like a cross between Denny's and Marie Callender's.  Their buns are THE BEST!!*

*Ok, it's late and a big beautiful, luxurious bed is calling out for me! G'nite!

Then Wake Up and Do Something More!

Last week, as I found myself driving home in the dark, the words of a beloved hymn came to mind....

Have I done any good in the world today?

Have I helped anyone in need?

Have I cheered up the sad and made someone feel glad?

If not, I have failed indeed.

Has anyone's burden been lighter today

Because I was willing to share?

Have the sick and the weary been helped on their way?

When they needed my help was I there?

Then wake up and do something more

Than dream of your mansion above.

Doing good is a pleasure, a joy beyond measure,

A blessing of duty and love.

 There are chances for work all around just now,

Opportunities right in our way.

Do not let them pass by, saying, "Sometime I'll try,"

But go and do something today.

'Tis noble of man to work and to give;

Love's labor has merit alone.

Only he who does something helps others to live.

To God each good work will be known.

I love this hymn.  It is so beautiful in the way of how we can and should do service.  Everything I've ever learned about service, my father taught me by example.  I will always be so grateful for his example. 

I got to thinking about my life and what I can do each day to serve.  Two things came to mind, if I can make someone laugh and serve someone, then I'm good.  Those are two things I plan on striving for, each day.  It may not seem like a lot, but it makes my day so much better.  

As my Dad said, "LDS stands for 'Let's Do Service or Let's Do Something!"  

Thanks Dad! 

Music in my heart.

Tonight, I somehow stumbled across this video and it's one of my most favorite Tongan hymns.  

It makes me think back to Sunday afternoons I use to spend with my parents, in my childhood home.  I would practice church hymns on my yellow piano, and my Mom would sing along.  Since she's a natural Alto, I would sing Soprano and then we'd switch so I could learn the Alto parts.  Occasionally. my Dad would join us and hum along to the Bass part.  My Dad had such a beautiful Bass voice and I miss hearing him sing, in church.  When my Dad would join my Mom and I, we'd switch over to singing Tongan hymns.  I was always grateful that he would join us and teach me about some of his favorite Tongan hymns.  

Tonight, as I was singing along to video above, my heart and mind found its way back to those cherished Sunday afternoons that we spent together.  I miss Sundays like those.

Cousin Lela & Fam!

I really like this picture of some of my Australian/New Zealand relatives.  My seester, nephew, niece and I were lucky to spend the day with them, at Disneyland. My cousin Lela is to my left, in the black & white, while her daughter Anna is on my right and her son Timothy is next to my seester, on the end.  
It's always been a lil confusing that Lela's my cousin because of the age gap but it was so nice spending time with her family.  She and I had the opportunity to talk about a lot of my Dad's relatives back in the south Pacific.  She pulled out her iPad and showed me pics of her siblings, my cousins.  Out of 12 of her siblings, I've only met 3 of them.  It's been so wonderful getting to know more about them and most especially learn a little more about my paternal grandfather, Simione.  He died in 1963 and I never met my grandma Salote who passed in 1997.  She told me that Simione wasn't very tall, but very patient, kind and gentle and had a head full of white hair.  As for grandma Salote, she had a very strong personality and if you didn't listen, you'd get in a lot of trouble.  Have I mentioned that I was named after her? :) She lived to be 104 years old and didn't need any glasses or aid for her old age.  Such a feisty woman and I look forward to meeting her, and grandpa Simione, someday.
It's been such a beautiful blessing to know more and more about my Dad's family.  I hope to meet more of them someday soon!

More and more like my Dad.

As I was reading one of my favorite blogs, she mentioned that she noticed that she’s a lot like her father.  Over the last few months, I’ve noticed how I too, have turned into my “father’s daughter.”  Sometimes, I don’t mind it….but then when I realize that it’s some of the traits I don’t particularly enjoy in him, that’s when I mind it the most. 

My Dad is a worrier. His top 2 worries for me, my sister and his grandchildren are always: 
-“Are they warm enough? Do they have a coat?” (Not a sweater, but always a coat! We live in San Diego, for crying out loud!)
-“Did they eat? We need to get them something to eat!”
He’s always concerned that I don’t eat or have anything to eat.  If he had his vision today, I think he could see that not having anything to eat is probably not my problem. In fact, I cook a lot of his meals, so it’s not like I couldn’t just cook myself something to eat.  He’s always pushing me to use his credit card to get something to eat, while I’m out, in case I get hungry.  I’m glad he cares.
So my Dad is a worrier, and he worries about everything under the sun.  I’ve come to notice that unfortunately, I’ve turned out the same way.  My poor Levi, who has to deal with a great amount of these worries.   I really do not like this side of myself, because it’s just unnecessary!! I’m TRYING to do better at worrying less, but sometimes (a lot of times), I fail.  I often chalk my Dad’s worrying up to being a “control issue”, til I realize that that could be my problem too….so then I try to think it’s because we care greatly for the welfare of loved ones.  Yep, that’s exactly what it is!  Maybe…probably….but we’re worriers, fortunately/unfortunately.

My Dad tends to hold grudges.  I like to think I don’t, but I know the truth; I do.  The same type of things that set him off, also set me off.  When something makes me upset, I can start to feel it across my face.  I have the very same mad look he does; the furled eyebrows, dead serious eyes and tight lips.  I wish I had more of a poker face, but I don’t--and he does (Why couldn’t I have that facial trait as well?!?) When my Dad was ever upset with a person or situation, he didn’t hide it.  He made it very clear.  I am the same way.  If he doesn’t like someone, he doesn’t put himself in a situation to be around that person.  Growing up, I thought that was odd, because I didn’t know him well enough.  Now that I’m older, I fully understand.  We both don’t tolerate excessive talking/noise, foul language, crude humor and ignorance.  Our patience level is a little lower than others in our family.  As he’s in his older age, I can tell when something’s ready to bother him because it’s already crossed my mind, as well.  Having something like this in common with him, has actually been a blessing because I always hope to put my Dad at ease, with everything and anything.  

There are good things that I do share with him.  Although we’re worriers, it comes with very good intentions.  We deeply love being around family.  They mean the world to us.  We would go to the ends of hell to keep them safe and protected.  When I was 12, laid up in bed, with a cast and Chicken Pox, my Dad would check up on me ALL the time.  I worried for him since he never had Chicken Pox before, but still he sat on my bed til I would fall asleep.  Every time I was sick, even til now, he makes sure I have everything I need.  Unfortunately, I’ve become very accustomed to this type of bedside manners---I know this won’t always be the case later in life :(  When others are sick, I’ve noticed that I tend to dote/smother them with any type of care I can offer.  I don’t like seeing them down and out, and not try to do something, anything.  
I learned service by watching and hearing stories of my Dad.  I haven’t yet perfected this, but I won’t stop trying.  This has been the greatest lesson my Dad ever taught me, especially since it was always by example.  LDS, didn’t just mean Latter-day Saint, he told me it meant, “Let’s do something”, “Let’s do service.”  Thanks Dad!

My Dad isn’t perfect, but I’ve come to realize that he’s the perfect father for me.  Sometimes I think he’s being hard headed, but I know it’s really just his tenacity……because I’m the same way.  

I Need Thee Every Hour...

Yesterday, I found out that my friends' Dad's health isn't so great. In fact, it's pretty terrible and he's very sick.  My heart goes out to my friends' Dad, Ric because he use to be my stake president.  I sincerely love this man, and it makes me so sad that he's not doing so well.  I don't know all the details, and I've heard some things {not sure how accurate it is} which makes my heart hurt so much.  Ric was such a extraordinary stake president!  I LOVED to hear him teach, from the pulpit.  I could sit for hours and listen to him.   While he was stake president, I came to enjoy stake conference A LOT more because of his talks.  His stories were like parables and I always felt uplifted, afterwards.  His infectious smile was very welcoming and made me ever so glad to be in his presence.
Whenever he was at a church meeting, that I had to play the piano or organ at, I grew a lil more nervous.  His wife & daughter also play, so I knew the standard to which he was use to.  However, he would always come over, greet me and thank me for playing so well {which honestly, wasn't always so well}.  After he told me his favorite hymn, I'd make it a point to play, "I Need Thee Every Hour" during my preludes.  I've had a couple opportunities to be in his home and he was always such a gracious host.   It was always so nice, that in a big stake like mine, with 2500+ members,  he remembered my name and always greeted me so warmly.  About 3 years ago, when I shaved my head, he approached me and asked if he could rub my prickly head.  I chuckled at such a request, and instantly let him.  I love this man.
I hope that his current health improves because I don't know how I could ever imagine being in my home stake and not see his big, warm smile.  This Sunday, all of Chula Vista Stake will be praying and fasting on his behalf.  After all he's ever done for me and my family,  I will most certainly find myself in sincere and humble prayer.

51 years.

 

For years, I had no clue what my Dad was doing in the photo above, til my nephew came home from his mission in the South Pacific.... But that's my Dad, the jokester.  

 

 Happy 51st Anniversary to my parents.  I hope they have a spectacular time celebrating their marriage today!! They teach me a lot about marriage.  I'm grateful that I still get to learn from and be loved by them.  I'm truly grateful that they were married 51 years ago in the Laie LDS temple, so that I can be sealed to them for time and all eternity.   What a beautiful blessing.

Spring Flingin'!

*Today's the FIRST day of Spring! Oh yeah! I LOVE IT!!  

*I feel so "weather spoiled" living here in San Diego! One could have sworn that it was Spring since about December. 

*Tonight my friend Dixie flies into town.  I haven't seen him in over a year.  I've missed him living here in San Diego because he's such a chill friend.  We'll be going on a "midnight taco run" tonight with Hermanita....I can't wait!

*I'm really enjoying the office I work in.  Most especially since all the fountain drinks are free! HOLA AQUA FRESCAS!!! I love the ice chips too!!!

*I've had cramps pretty badly today.  Seriously, Aleeve has helped, but not entirely. Even my lower back hurts with it....arg! Speaking of "arg".... AntiBacterial gel splashed onto my eyelash/eye today.  I have no idea how it happened, but man, I had to squeeze my eye shut so it wouldn't seep in.  It made me chuckle a little, just cause that's never happened before.  

*Last weekend was absolutely WONDERFUL!!! Levi & I had a fun time using his new camera down at the Coronado Ferry Landing.  Saturday was my Dad's birthday and it was WAY fun playing Tripoly with Kalanster & Levi for the first time.  Levi ended up winning!  I have no idea how he ALWAYS wins!! Seriously, how did the competitive girl end up with the guy who wins almost everything?!?! Sunday was nice reconnecting with Ame and having a blast at ward potluck.  Everything about this past weekend was just all around GREAT!!

*I'm LOVING the Mexican food here at work.  Seriously, it's fantastic being able to have huevos con chorizo, arroz,frijoles y tortillas for breakfast! I LOVE IT!!! 

Long Distant Relatives.

I'm currently reading, The Friday Night Knitting Club.  It's about a working single Mom, who's Caucasian, named Georgia and her half Black daughter Dakota.  James, Dakota's father, left Georgia and Dakota to work in Paris.  Georgia didn't speak ill of James, but wasn't thrilled when he decided to return to New York, thirteen years later.  James realized that he needed and wanted to be a part of Dakota's life.  He wanted her to get to know his side of the family and culture.  Dakota wanted to know that side, as well.
On Facebook, I saw that I had a photo tag, in an unfamiliar photo.  I clicked on it and then realized that I didn't really know anyone, but I knew that they were from my Tongan side due to their clothes.  I asked my cousin Timothy, via FB, if he could tell me who they all were from left to right. [For remembrance sake: Mele (NZ), Siu (Aus), Tae (NZ), Tita (Aus), Suliana (Aus), Milika (Aus), Lela (Aus), Dorothy (USA)…and the minister in the back is one of their four Brothers – Manase (Vava’u)].  I've met my cousin Lela in teal and her brother Manase, when I was very young. 
I looked at these women and I felt like I could see family resemblences.  I felt like I looked like them.  My thick, coarse hair makes sense now, as well as my round nose and body structure.  Even though I've never met 80% of the people in this picture, I could feel that they were my family.  My Dad started to tell me stories of his family members, and in particular all my (above) cousins' Dad, Peau.  I love hearing stories of my Dad's family and his homeland of Tonga.  I feel a little bit more connected to a land and people that I have yet to meet.
I look forward to the day that I find myself on a plane headed to the south Pacific.  Just like Dakota, I want to get to know my family members and know where I came from.  However, in the meantime, I'm grateful for the magic of technology that can bring families together....even when we're oceans apart. 

Thank you Facebook.