Thursday, July 26, 2012

A July Quickie....

*Oh I love me some wedding blogs:

*My Meniere's has been kicking my arse more than ever.  Seriously, it sucks.  My head feels like it's in a constant tailspin. I feel like I have to be constantly moving, to fight against the Vertigo that sets in.  I'm sure to those around me, it looks like I can't sit still.  If I try to sit still I feel like I'm gonna fall out of my seat.  Stupid Meniere's Disease!

*My nephew Bub has been here for the last week and it's been so wonderful having him around.  I've become so accustomed to him not living here, which is a good thing because I tend to hold on too tightly to my nephews & niece.  What can I say, I love them so much!  Bub leaves for his TWO YEAR mission in about a month.  Man, I'm not ready to not having him a phone call away.  

*My niece returned back to school this week.  Time flies by so quickly!  I like when kids are out for the summer because I feel like they're able to just be kids and carefree.  Sometimes I think the world asks them to grow up too quickly.  

*My calling at church has been getting better.  I'm the Family Home Evening Committee Chair (I think that's a stupid name since I'm obviously not the "Chairman".....can't I just be the "FHE Prez" or the "FHE Mama"?) and I've finally added to my committee.  I finally got smart and added some friends to the committee, which makes a difference.  Sometimes the call feels a lil daunting since I still don't know the ward as much as I'd like to.  I just want everyone to come out to FHE and have a great time.  

*I don't know if much has improved since laaaaaaast Saturday.  Sometimes, I want to go out of my way to help my Dad with a particular task, but then I don't want to become a doormat later.  I was talking with my Mom today, but I made sure not to say too much.  I've always wished I had the type of Mother/Daughter relationship that I could openly talk and share my thoughts & feelings with.  Sadly, I don't and I need to be on guard of the things I share with my parents because it'd be like giving them ammo for later.  When I was dating & later broke it off with Morgan, I thought I could share lil things with my know, how most Mom & daughters talk.  It didn't matter because she ended up using it against me in an argument.  I've learned a lot from my parents, both good and bad.  My heart will forever long to have a ideal relationship with my parents. I don't think this will ever happen. If ever I'm blessed with the opportunity to be a parent, I hope my kids will trust me enough to talk and share their lives with me.  I hope they'll know how much I'll love them, by word and deed.  

*I started to talk to Logan again, thinking we could try to be friends....  He's TOO hung up on the fact that I'm Mormon.  He continually compares me to the Mormons he knew up in Utah.  It's like I have to prove to him that I'm not like that, nor am I your typical Mormon.  He thinks I know nothing about the Catholic religion, that ALL my time is spent on church stuff, that ALL my friends are Mormons and basically I have no life outside of church.  I just couldn't do it anymore. I hate when I have to prove myself on anything, it means that someone's not believing if I'm lying.  Grrr!!  So yet again, I've said good bye to Logan. This time it's for good.  GRRR MEN!

*Oh speaking of which... I didn't go to Pride.  My Meniere's was a huge factor in it.  I just couldn't handle the dizzy head and didn't want the lack of sleep and extreme sun to add to it.  I'm kinda bummed, but there's always next year.  

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